Love Is Just a Game
by RiahReanna
Summary: Bella has the perfect life. Quater back boyfriend Jacob Black, best friend ever, good grades, and fairly popular. But what happens when she gets some unexpected news and her boyfriend dissapers? Can Edward, back from china, fix her broken heart? or...not?
1. Chapter 1TouchDown!

I sat in the grass with my best friend at my side. We both cheered loudly when Jasper caught the ball and ran intently for the touchdown. Alice held me tight do to the suspense as Jasper sprinted closer to the line.

"and a amazing touchdown coming from number 14 Jasper Hale!" the announcer cheered to the crowd.

Alice and I stood to cheer, jumping up and down. The whole team slapped hands.

"That is, ladies and gents, another win for Forks high. Be sure to give a extra cheer for our top players. Numbers 14 and 17. Jasper Hale and Jacob Black everyone!" the said.

Jacob removed his helmet before running towards us. With one arm he picked me up and spun me around. I laughed when he tumbled and we crashed, luckily, down to the soft grass. His chest rumbled with laughter underneath me. After he was able to get his chuckles under control he smiled at me.

"You guys did it again, babe!" I kissed his nose lightly.

"Uh-uh", he said as he grabbed my face between his huge hands. He smashed his lips to mine. A little embarrassed, I made sure I didn't allow him to take it any further in public. After pulling away to roll his eyes at me with a chuckle he helped me up. Alice had disappeared. So I guessed she went after Jasper. Jacob tugged on my hand lightly.

"Jasper is having a victory party at his house. Please tell me your coming? 'Cause I am not going without you" he looked down at me.

I nodded reluctantly. Jacob and his liquor, I thought to myself. If he was drinking it meant I was drinking. One of his little annoying rules. And that meant if Jasper's drinking, Alice is drinking. Another thing I wasn't looking forward to. Alice gets a little rowdy when she's drunk. I would be the one taking care of her of course. Once Jasper gets to drinks in him he paces out.

"Oh and Bella, don't think I don't know how you do it. You get one drink, wait till I'm drunk so you think I don't know. But this time, I'm not drinking till your drunk first." he smirked.

I nodded again. Tonight, I wasn't up to fight about it with him. And I also figured I could use some loosening up.

"Bella!" I heard Alice call from behind me.

She had Jasper at tow, a huge grin spread across her face. I sensed that she heard about the victory party tonight. I knew the exact words that would escape from her lips next.

"We have to go get ready for the party. Meet you at Jasper's in a bout an hour?" she eyed them, making it clear that it was best to say okay.

They nodded and Alice grabbed my wrist before I could kiss Jake goodbye. She pulled me as fast as she could to her car. When I slid in the front seat she caught my expression.

"Bella, I only have an hour to get both you and myself ready and looking the way you do now I could use all the time I can get. So that why we rush." she said as she sped down the road to my house.

Within two minutes we were in front of my house. I was relieved to see that Charlie must have been working late because his cruiser was nowhere in site. Yes, I thought, I can just right him a note.

Inside my room I sat on my bed as Alice searched through my closet looking for something for me to wear. She threw me a a skirt over her head. Then a gray tank top. I put them on reluctantly.

"It's so lucky that I keep an extra pair of cloths here," she pulled out her own cloths then looked at me "No, no, no, Bella, like this." she said, pulling my skirt just below my breast.

After fixing my hair and makeup she went to work on herself. Putting on her cloths, fixing her hair, applying her makeup her special way. While she was putting on the finishing touches I headed down stairs to right Charlie a note.

_Dad, I'm staying at Alice's tonight. I hope that's okay. We both have our phones. I can't find a charger so my phone might die. If so just call Alice. You have her number. Love you. _

_-Bella_

Alice came down the stairs just as I finished the note. I had to say, my best friend was a beauty. Her hair was, unusually, straight. It was amazing how she could make a casual dress look like a ball gown. I smiled at her.

"You look gorgeous, love" I said with a English accent.

" As do you," she chuckled " Ready?"

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**I am brand new to FanFiction. Not brand new at writing tho. So I am very excited to get this started. I figured i'd make this chapter a lil shorter than i'd like to. Why i haven't a clue. Review if you'd like. I'd be good to know how I'm doing. Sense i have absolutely no life, I should have another chapter up by tomarrow(: I stay up late so it may even be by tonight.**


	2. Chapter 2 Victory Party

Once Alice was buckled safely in the front seat she blared the music with a smile in my direction. I smiled back recognizing the song. When Katy Perry came on the chorus Alice and I chanted together.

"California girls, were unforgettable! Fine, fresh, fierce we got it on lock"

We giggled together as we danced to the music. When the song trickled to a end Alice turned the volume down. There was still a huge smile on her face.

"So...," she looked at me "I think tonight's the night." I eyed her with a confused expression.

"The night?"

"You know, the night me and Jasper-" she trailed off shrugging her shoulders for me to catch her drift.

"Oh!" I said pulling the word out longer than it needed to be. "What makes you think that?"

"Well, I don't know...," she sighed "maybe I just want it to be. Every time I ask about it he says its not proper and that he wasn't raised like that. He can even stop himself when he's drunk. He's dead set in his ways, Bella. But, you know me I'm not one to give up" she said as she turned a corner sharp.

I noticed the street. It was one Alice and I had taken so many times before. All the victory parties we hosted at Jasper's house. Mostly because his parents were very rarely home. His house came into view seconds later. No matter how many times I'd been here I was and probably always will be stunned at how big it was. Bigger than, and I didn't think it was possible, Alice's house.

The lawn was a perfect green. Most likely fake. The house was white. A blinding white at that. Though I wasn't a big fan of it, the trim of the house was yellow. Somehow that yellow just completed the mansion. Three stories of any kids dream house.

Alice parked the car a little ways down the street. Do to the cars already in front, there weren't any free spaces closer. We walked hand in hand up the street. The music was already playing and we could hear it from our place a little ways down from the house. I glanced at Alice, who was smiling shaking her head. I did the same, unable to hold back my urge to mimic her reaction. We walked up his steps in silence. When we reached the door Alice looked at me. I smiled as she held her hand up to knock.

Suddenly the door swung open. Mike Newton came stumbling out the doorway and ran right into us. He used our shoulders to straighten himself up.

"Hey, Bella. Hey, Alice. Sorry 'bout that" he slurred his words.

I could smell the alcohol on his breath. "It's okay Mike," I said removing his arm from my shoulder "maybe you should come in and lay down?"

He backed down one step "Nope, gotta...need. I need air fresh. No, fresh air, yeah, that's right" he said stumbling away. Alice and I looked at each other before cracking up.

"And just what is so funny?" I heard Jake's voice come from behind me.

I turned still laughing. Jake stood leaned against the doorway, his arms crossed over his chest. Jasper was behind him looking polite. His hands were behind his back as he stood ram rod straight. Jake smiled at me, his grin evil. I looked down and shook my head, trying to hide my blush.

"Alice? You up for a walk?" I looked up to see Jasper staring intently at Alice. She nodded and took his out stretched hand. I watched them walk down the road together already in deep conversation. Slowly I turned back to Jacob.

I was surprised to see that he had stepped from the doorway and was inches away from me. He pressed his palm gently to my face. I sighed in content. He then moved his mouth to my neck. The warmth of his lips grazed it lightly. His hands grasped my hips tightly as he pulled me closer.

"H-have you been-" I paused as he moved his lips to my shoulder "drinking." the last word came out on a sigh.

He stopped before coming to my ear "Not a drop, Bella. Should drinking be my only excuse to have a reason to touch you?"

I shook my head as he kissed my jaw. I moved my hands to his neck and pulled him to face me. His eyes were black with desire. My smile, I was unable to hide or stop. It felt nice to think I could make him feel like this. He lowered his lips to mine. I yelped when I was rammed from behind. Jake caught me before I could fall.

"What the hell Mike!" Jake fumed.

"Hey!" I said to Jake "Lets go in and get a drink." I pulled his arm gently toward the house, avoiding a fight.

Mike didn't seem anymore sober than before or didn't even seem to know he was around other people because he was just stumbling in circles. Jake lifted a lip before giving in and leading me into the house. I recognized every dazed face as we pushed through the small crowd. The music was even louder inside. As we entered the kitchen I began to wonder where my best friend was. Before I could dwell on the thought Jake grabbed me a cup from the full counter.

"Here" he said watching me closely.

Before I could talk myself out of it I through my head back and let the drink slide down my throat.

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**A/N**

**I'm very impatient when it comes to writing. I always want to get to the good parts. So I often find myself rushing. Alice's POV next Chapter. Review if you'd like.**


	3. Chapter 3 Marry Me?

**~APOV**

Jasper and I walked off the front porch hand in hand. I had to fight my best to ignore the electric feeling I got from his contact. We barely hit the end of the side walk before he stirred up conversation.

"I trust that you and Bella got ready without to much of a fuss?" he said, a tune of a accent in his voice.

"Without as much fuss as possible, yes." I replied smiling up at him

He unclasped our hands to wrap an arm around my waist. "And may I say, Alice, you look breath taking tonight" He dipped down low to my ear "You make it extremely difficult for me to resist myself"

I shivered as his warm breath hit my ear. He noticed because he stopped our steady pace and smiled down at me.

"You do realize that you don't have to resist...anything." I said with confidence. He looked at me, the smile vanished from his face, before continuing to walk. He stopped us in front of the woods two houses down. I immediately recognized the spot. It was a path that we hiked a million times before. He tugged me forward and I followed silently.

If it would have been anyone else but Jasper I wouldn't have gone. Jasper made me feel safe even in the dark heading into the blind woods. It may be because I knew he had incredible vision, don't ask how or why. It was like he had vampire sight. We stopped walking and as my vision cleared I could make out Jasper grinning at me widely.

"Jasper, what are you smiling at" I asked resting my hand on his chest. I could faintly make out him shaking his head. He kissed me lightly on the forehead and rested his lips there.

"Jasper-" I began suddenly winded." I don't understand why we can't just-" he silenced me with his lips. I was unable to protest, I really thought I was getting my way. He traced the bottom of my lip with his tongue. Moaning into his mouth, my hands moved to the buttons of his shirt. I fiddle with the first one, finding it difficult to undo . Forcing myself, I pulled away to focus on his shirt. His hands gripped mine in place. I sighed in defeat.

"Marry me first Alice. If you marry me I promise you I will spend the rest of my life making love to you but only until we are wed will I make any move to touch you in that way" he dipped down to one knee.

I backed away from him stunned. _I'm 18, only 18, _I thought, _to young, to young, one man for the rest of my life? _My vision blurred with tears. I needed out of here, I needed my best friend, I needed to think. Right now I wasn't thinking clearly.

"Alice, I only think of you. I can't picture myself with anyone else. You...your-" he huffed before grabbing my face in his hands. I was forced to stare him in the eye, " Your amazing. You make me laugh at times that it seems impossible to feel anything but pain, your smart, everyone your around or who knows you wants to be a better person. There is a positive energy about you that is just so intriguing. When we argue its so hard to keep up my front, its nearly impossible to be mad for two seconds with you, Alice, you don't understand!"

I could barely comprehend what he was saying. All I wanted to do was get out of there to think, to breath, anything! I pried his hands from my face, to stumble backwards. Shaking my head, only able to shake my head, I began to form words.

"I h-have to think, Jasper...I-I have to go." I said as I backed my way out. As soon as he was out of sight I booked it back to the house to look for Bella.

**~BPOV**

I laughed as Jacob nibbled on my ear. My grip was firm on my back to keep myself from stumbling. He had me pressed tight against the kitchen counter. Do to my intoxication, I didn't mind all the drunk people watching and occasionally bumping into us. All I could seem to do was laugh and hold on for dear life.

Jake whispered into my ear. The loud music drowned out his words, so, like I had been all night, I replied with a laugh. I felt his warm hand, under my shirt, on my hip. The song shifted again to something I didn't recognize. Soon I began to sway. Not because I liked the song, no, because it made me feel less likely to fall. Jake reached around me to grab another cup full of beer. I took it from him happily. I was thankful for my lack of taste when I was drunk because I was sure if I were sober and drank warm beer like that, my gag reflexes would be working over time.

I peeked over Jake's shoulder and saw a head I recognized. Black hair bobbed through the crowd. I jumped up in down in Jacob's arms in excitement. "Alice! Over here, Alice" she caught eye of me and moved faster. As she got closer I could tell she was crying. Her mascara ran down her face, her eyes swollen.

"Oh Alice!" I pushed out of Jake's arms. "Alice, w-whats wrong?" I held on to her for support. She just shook her head at me. "No, no, no, don't sh-shake your head at me Missy!"

"Bella, I'm going home. I trust Jacob can get you home tomorrow." She eyed Jake who nodded

"But whats wrong!"

"I'll tell you tomorrow when you can remember" she turned and walked away. Not even waiting for a reply. I shrugged it off. Smiling to myself I swayed to the music, I was only able to concentrate on that it seemed. As the song trickled off and morphed into another recognizable song that I loved I literally jumped for joy. Instead of swaying, I began to dance. Like actually full blown grinding with the air and "dropping low". I eyed Jacob, who was staring at me, a grin on his face, longingly. Bumping and grinding my way over to him, I gripped his wrist and pulled him to the living room where all the couples were dancing.

Again, if I were sober, I would have shunned and been discussed by the way they all were dancing, I mean they were practically fucking on the dance floor. And as I felt the last beer affect me, I didn't care, I actually wanted to dance like that. Jake placed himself behind me, mimicking the other bodies. I danced against his body, reaching my hands up to grab his neck lightly, twisting around to kiss him. Failing miserably, and licking his lips and cheeks. I bent over, holding my stomach, and laughed my guts out. As I did so I felt something hard against my ass, which, I laughed at as well. Twisting around so I was facing him, he looked at me with a wry smile as I laughed some more.

"Jacob Black, I do believe your blushing" I said tracing my hands down his body and stopped a finger right on his thigh. He flinched away from my contact.

"Bella, you really shouldn't do that. You tease me" he whispered in my ear. I grabbed the nape of his neck gingerly. I hadn't realize I was trembling. I kissed his neck, lingering there for a moment.

"Take me somewhere" I said as low as I could for him to still hear. Pulling away I looked at him curiously. He was wide eyed before he took my hand and led me away.

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**A/N**

**This chapter was difficult for me to write. I kept changing things and ultimately didn't like the outcome. Part of this story was a personal experiance and it was fun recalling it and then changing it to how I would have prefered it. I hope you liked. Review, make my day(:**


	4. Chapter 4 Good Morning Hangover

**A/N I wanted to thank everyone who reviewed. I enjoyed writing this chapter, so i hope you enjoy reading it.**

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I squinted into the darkness of the room, trying to make out objects. My head was pounding with an intensity to make me scream. _Yep, Bella, your hungover, _I thought. It took me a few minutes, but I soon realized my head was rested on Jake's bare chest. _Bare? Oh no! _I sprang forward to sit up. My eyes shifted everywhere, more adjusted now. Our cloths lay on the floor next to my bed. Could you guess what I looked at second? Myself, that's right. After seeing my bare chest I scrambled for the sheets to cover myself up.

That's when it hit me, I remembered, I remembered the whole thing. I sure was gone last night. In fact that's the only thing I remembered vividly. Faintly, I remembered Alice, she was crying. Everything before my first three beers was clear. Dancing? Yep, that was still there This room? Nope, I don't remember how I got in here. Just what I did in here. I smack my hand to my forehead, my head shaking.

I took that chance to look at Jacob. He was on his back breathing heavily. Smiling was just something I had to do. When Jake slept he looked so innocent...for lack of word. He looked more like the boy I had a crush on when we were kids. Ever sense I could remember, my father would take me to La Push with him when he went fishing. Jake and I would go down to the beach and play while Sue watched us. My mom left us when I was just a baby. Moved to Florida to pursue her life long dream of being an actress. Charlie would send me back to see her every summer and for thanksgiving break. Of course she remarried a nice man, that I had nothing against, he just wasn't my dad.

Anyways back to Jake. The sheets lay right above his hips, keeping anything important covered. _Maybe I'm overreacting, _I thought, _Maybe it was bout time we had sex. _I laid back down next to him, soon I found myself watching him. Unable to resist I planted a soft kiss on his cheek. He stirred the tiniest bit before huffing and turning over. I smiled to myself. _Thump thump thump. _

"Ugh!" I said gripping my head. I needed Aspirin. _Beep! Beep! Beep!_

I jumped at the sound of my phone. Again, I smacked my forehead, Charlie! Getting up slowly, so I wouldn't wake Jacob, I went to my pants pocket. I had 3 missed calls two from Alice one from my father, and 2 new texts, also form Alice. I read the texts first.

**Bella! Major problem need your help... -Alice**

Next message.

**Bella! Answer your phone. Call me when u get up. -Alice.**

She'd have to wait, I had to phone Charlie first to make sure my cover wasn't blown. I punched in the home phone and walked to the bathroom to left. After raping one of the sheets around me. Thankfully Jake didn't notice. _This must have been a guest bedroom, _I thought.. While the phone rang, I looked at myself in the mirror . I felt trashy, my hair was a complete mess. It was then that I prayed nobody remembered anything I did last night. I wasn't one to be like that. Regularly, I'm a shy person.

"Hello." Charlie came on the phone and I was caught by surprise.

"Oh hey, Dad. You called?"

"Oh yeah, well, I just wanted to check in, I guess" he sounded concerned. Probably because I hadn't answer.

"Yeah, Dad. I'm fine. Alice and I just stayed up real late, so we slept in. I uh..have to go see Jake today, I should be home in time for dinner." I said looking for the time. I found a clock right above the mirror. 3:17?

"Okay, Bells, I'll see you then...love you" he it cautiously the way he always did. It seemed like he was scarred to say it. Like one day I am just going to up and say "don't tell me you love me dad! I hate you" or something.

"Love you too, bye" he breathed a goodbye and hung up. Searching through the draws I found a comb and pulled it through my hair.

_I can't believe it's already three. Wait it's three? Bella, doesn't Jake have to be at practice at four? Shoot!_

I all but ran to Jake's side of the bed."Jake? Wake up." I kissed his forehead and he smiled, his eyes still closed.

"Bella..." he whispered now opening his eyes and resting a hand on my cheek "Ah. Bells." I squealed as he pulled me on top of him. The sheet that was rapped tightly around me fell slightly. I went to recover it but his hands stopped me cold. Soon he had me flipped over on my back, his body between my legs. This time the sheets fell all the way off of him. I focus, deliberately, away from the area. Fortunately, my covers were still on in that area for me. I held in a moan as he kissed up my chest to my neck

_Keep on track Bella! Don't get-_

I was cut short of thought as he licked the nape of my neck. Oh. Dear. Lord.

"Jake.." I breathed. His mouth was so busy all he could get out was a hmm."Don't you have practice at 4?"

"It's okay. Were aloud to miss this one" he pressed harder against me. I held my breath as he descended down toward my breast again. Pulling down the sheet so I was reviled, he was breathing hard. I felt my breath creeping toward hyperventilation. Before he could get his mouth down...there, I pulled it to my lips. Our tongues fought against each other as he wiggled his way inside my sheet with me. _Ring, ring, ring! _I stiffened underneath him.

"Jake, it might be Charlie" he huffed and rolled off me. I ran for the bathroom, this time not bothering with the sheet.

"Hello?" I said winded

"Now you answer!" Alice chimed in. I smiled to myself, happier to hear her voice then ever.

"Sorry, I didn't wake up till like 5 minutes ago"

"Uh-huh, you hungover, I can tell. Anyways we have a lot to talk about, Bella. Can you come over?" she said talking in her normal fast speed.

"Uh, yeah. I'll be over in like 10?" I asked

"Kay, bye" she hung up. I came back in the room to see Jake still on the bed waiting. Gathering my cloths up, I covered myself with them. His smile fell into an immediate frown once he realized what I was doing.

"Alice needs me." I shrugged turning for the bathroom.

**APOV**

Bella and I sat on my bed trying to sort out my dilemma. It had been this silent after I told her the story of the night before. I could tell she was in deep thought because her eyebrows were pulled together, making frown wrinkles on her forehead.

"Well, do you love him?" she asked out of the blue. I didn't hesitate because I already knew my answer.

"Of course I love him, Bella"

"and there's no one else you want to be with?"

"Uh, n-no" I stuttered

"Then what's the problem?"

"I'm only 18" I almost yelled.

"Alice, your making this way more difficult then it needs to be. I know you, and I know that you guys will be together when your 20 something! So what's the difference of saying yes now. He's completely in love with you and don't tell me you don't feel the same way" Bella grabbed my hands while saying this. When she explain it that way I felt stupid. I felt stupid for even thinking I might want to be with someone else. Jasper was sweet, confident in a modest way, the whole package really. I felt guilty of all things. I ran out on Jasper and probably made him feel like a complete fool.

"Up to make a visit to Jasper?" I asked Bella.

**At Jasper's house.**

I sat next to Jasper holding his hand. To tell you the truth I was surprised he even chose to talk to me after what I did. I was sure to keep our eyes locked. It took me a moment for me to talk. I was practicing breathing right.

"You don't know how bad I feel. Obviously I hadn't been thinking straight. I'm not making excuses for myself but it caught me way off guard. I love you Jasper and, if your still willing, I would love to marry you" He eyed me before smiling a huge grin. I returned the smile as he got on one knee. Pulling a box out of his pocket, he open it before me. I heard Bella's gasp over my own. It was a ribbon shaped diamond ring.

"Remember when I gave you one similar to this on our first date? The one I got out of the vending machine?" I nodded bringing my ring finger to show him I still had it on. But by now, of course it far tarnished. "Well, I thought I'd get you a ring that mattered and had reason. This is just the engagement ring. The actual ring you will get later on" he pulled the ring out of the box and I removed my tarnished one replacing it where the engagement ring was. He looked at me confused.

"It's the first thing you ever gave to me. I wanna keep it" I clarified. Tears began to form as he slipped it on my finger. Before he could make a statement on my crying I hugged him tight. Over his shoulder I saw Bella. She was crying to, like a proud mother. She mouthed an I love you and I did the same.

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**A/N**

**i have bad news. My mom and step Dad are getting a divorce. Money was tight when they were together so you can only imagine how bad this is gunna be for my mother. My internet and cable are do to be shut off tomarrow. updates are going to be scares for a long while. I aplogize to my loyal followers. I worked my hardest to get this chapter jam packed. I'm staying up extra late tonight to get the other chapter done. maybe even other. But like this one it'll be very rushed and squeezed together. Again thanks so much and please review.**


	5. Chapter 5 Welcome Home

**2 months later**

Alice and I pulled into the school parking lot on Monday morning. She already got through with her ranting and raving about driving in my truck today. Actually, I was proud of her, she had it all finished in five minutes. She said it was very unclassy to arrive anywhere in this, as she called it, "thing".We pulled into our usual spot. So generously saved by Jake and Jasper every morning. Jake was leaned against the rabbit when I got out. Alice skipped over to Jasper. They greeted every morning the same way. A chased kiss and hand in hand.

Jake was less polite. He always wanted a full blown make-out. Something I wouldn't do. As I said before, I'm a shy person. I allow a ten second kiss. I probably sound controlling don't I? Oh well.

"Morning, Bells" He said dipping down for his morning kiss. Before his lips could get to mine I felt my stomach clench. My throat felt suddenly warm and I knew what was coming next. I clasped a hand over my mouth and ran behind my truck. My breakfast came up and and I puked. Jake was already behind me holding my hair out of my face and rubbing my back. I puked until my stomach felt empty.

"Oh Bella! I'll take you home" Alice came up to me, pulling me up from my bent over position. I handed her the keys as she help me over to the passenger side. Next thing I knew we were already on our way to my house. Leaning my head against the cool window I tried to focus on anything but puking.

"Distract me, Alice" I groaned.

"Oh, uh, did I tell you Edward's coming home?" she asked.

I looked at her surprised. "From China? When?" I asked trying to hide my excitement.

"Tomorrow, actually. He flies in at Port Angelas at 5 . I'm getting out of school early with Emmett to go get him." she said matter-of-factly. Edward was an old friend. I really good friend. He left 5 years ago to be a exchange student, sort of. His parents sent him to a school there. Something he actually was excited about. It was more challenging, and gave him more opportunities. Evan a free scholarship for any collage he chooses.

"Can I come with?" the words came out before I could stop them

She chuckled, "Didn't you just puke your guts out? You shouldn't come to school tomorrow."

"Alice, I'll stay home tomorrow for you sake but all I have to do is say Jake is taking me to dinner in Port Angelas. You know he wont say no to Jacob"

"Okay, if you can convince Charlie, I don't mind" she smiled at me. We pulled in front of my house 2 seconds later. "Oh crap! How am I getting back to school."

I laughed at her "You can take my truck. I just need the key for the house. Charlie isn't here." I jumped out and walked to the drivers side. She rolled down the window and I snatched the keys from her. After unlocking the door, I ran the keys back to her.

"Are you sure you'll be okay?" she asked putting it into reverse. I nodded and waved as she backed out. When I got in the house I phoned Charlie and told him the story and said to call the school. By the time I was done with that I barely had enough energy to get up the stairs. I just flopped on my bed and crashed.

I awoke to the sound of Charlies cruiser pulling in the drive way, through my open window. Looking at the clock before jumping up, it was 5:15. Holy cow. I walked to the window and, sure enough, my truck was in its place.

_Shoot, Bella, you forgot dinner! _

I jogged down stairs and straight into the kitchen. Opening up the freezer I pretended I had been debating on what to make for a while. I pulled out fish sticks and fries. Charlie still wasn't in yet, most likely chatting it up with the neighbors. I thanked God and searched for a cookie sheet. By the time Charlie was in the house, I had the fish sticks and fries in the oven.

"Hey Bells, 'whatcha got 'cookin?"

"Fish sticks and fries they'll be done in 13 minutes" he planted himself on the couch.

After 10 fish sticks and who knows how many fries I felt exhausted. I told Charlie I was retiring to my room, that I was tired and dragged my way up to my room. I fell on my bed again but, as tired as I was, I was unable to sleep. Finally giving up at 1:30 I went for a hot shower. I turned the water on as hot as it could go and stripped. I showered and thought. About Edward.

_**Flash Back~**_

Edward and I stood in front of each other at the airport before he left. I was 13. He was the same. I was bawling my eyes out. Who could blame me, my best friend was leaving for a very long time.(Yes, not only Alice but Edward was my best friend to, although if he would have been up to dating...) Edward hugged me before coming to his crying sister. He hugged her tight before hugging his parents and, although he was very resentful about it, hugging a very young 15 year old Emmett. He walked away silent without looking back.

_**End of flash back~**_

I found myself imagining a night alone with Edward. I stopped the thought cold. _Remember your boyfriend? Jacob? Yeah, Yeah, I remember._

Back in my room I was showered and in bed ready for sleep to overcome me. And, luckily, it did. I slept dreamless. That was a very nice change, freaky dreams have been invaded my sleep for about a month and a half.

My father came into my room in the morning, I faintly remembered him talking to me, but I was still so tired I couldn't wake up. I woke up to my phone ringing on my bed stand. I answered it groggy.

"Bella? Were you sleeping?" Alice asked.

"Uh, yeah" I rubbed my eyes.

"Maybe you shouldn't come. You sound tired"

I sat up quick. "No, no, no. I'm good." My phone beeped to the other line "Other line, I'll be ready by 3:45" I crossed over. "Hello?" it came out as a question

"Oh Bells your awake."

"Yeah, Dad. Jake wants to take me out on a date in Port Angelas"

"Okay, when do you think you'll be home?" he asked

"Like 10:00. There's a movie to" I lied

It was 3:00 and I started to panic. I told Charlie I had to go I started to get ready. A moosing and a 10 minute makeup later, I was looking for something to wear. I couldn't recall the last time I actually cared about dressing up. My first date with Jake, maybe? I chose something casual. Some worn out jeans and a yellow tank top. Looking outside, I knew it was too cold for a tank top, so I started searching for my gray long sleeve pull over. I heard honking coming from outside. I knew it was Alice and Emmett. Finally finding it I pulled it on and grabbed my purse. Half running down the stairs. I opened the door I was surprised to see Emmett hand up about to knock on the it. He picked me up, our normal greeting, and started carrying me down the stairs. After reaching and shutting the door of course. He set me gently in the back seat. My best friends turned in the front seat and greeted me. Soon we were on our way. The purr of Emmett's car relaxed my nerves and ultimately put me to sleep. Which I was grateful for because I wasn't looking forward to a long car ride. Long car rides made me sick. This time my sleep wasn't so sound. I jolted forward screaming, Alice and Emmett jumped alarmed.

"Bella?" Alice asked worried. I calmed my breath and tried not to think of my dream.

"I'm fine. Just a bad dream is all. Where are we?" I asked looking around. We were in some kind of parking garage.

"The airport. We didn't want to wake you."

"Believe me I would have preferred you did. What time is it?" I asked scooting so I could see them both.

"It's five right now but his plain came in early, we just waiting for him to get his bags." she said unbuckling herself. I hadn't realized that I wasn't wearing mine. For a police chief's daughter, I really didn't obeyed by the law well.

They got out and I did the same. It was then that I saw him. He was a changed man. Elegant, really. He wore a blue button down shirt and gray khakis. His jaw was set, chiseled. All I could do was stand and stare. Unable to recover my jaw, that was dropped to the ground. Alice ran and jumped into his arms already crying. They hugged for what seemed like forever.

"Oh Edward!" she sobbed. He put his adoptive sister down to look at her.

"Alice, your all grown up" His voice was beautiful. He seemed like he was crying to. Alice did a turn around for him. Emmett approached slowly holding his hands out. They hugged like mans with hard slaps on the back.

"Welcome, back little bro" he said in his deep voice. Emmett picked his brothers bags up while fishing the keys out of his pocket to pop the trunk. Edward didn't seem to notice me, not a good sign, until he got closer.

"Bella? Bella Swan?" said coming closer. I nodded biting my lip through a smile. Then he was running. At the end of his jog he picked me up and swung me around. I hugged tightly to him giggling. His scent was intoxicating. I suddenly felt light headed. He put me on my feet but kept his hands on my hips. I did a once over smiling.

"My best friend is all grown up." he said. I rapped my arms around his neck into another hug. I missed this. We released each other but he kept and arm on my waist. We watched Emmett put the bags in the trunk. He let go so we could get in the car. When we were in he immediately took my hand. I began to wonder, subconsciously, if I should put a stop to it. I pushed the thought away.

_This was in no way wrong._

"So guys fill me in on everything" he said giving my hand a squeeze.

"Jasper and I are getting married. Which you already know. Bella has a boyfriend. She's definitely not the little Bella you used to know." Alice eyed me through the mirror. I blushed and looked away. Edward squeezed my hand again. Soon he was tracing small circles on my hand with his thumb. Our conversation lasted the whole ride home. We got to the Cullen's house just about 9. I almost cried when Esme greeted her son. We got him settled in and I found myself, somehow, alone with him in his room.

"Bella, you have changed so much" Edward said sitting next to me on his bed. I nodded in agreement.

I clock caught my eye and I panicked. It was already nine fifty-five.

"Shoot. I gotta get home." I stood quickly.

"Well, I'll take you." he said grabbing Emmett's keys that were left on his nightstand. We rushed down the stairs as fast as possible. The whole family shot us a look. Edward pointed to me and they caught the drift. He led me to the garage, like he never left and still remembered every location in the house. He opened the car door for me like a gentlemen. He got in his seat opened the garage door and sped out. I held on for dear life.

"Jesus Edward!" I said buckling my seat belt.

"Sorry," he still didn't slow down "in China I learned how to drive. Races and drifting is popular over there."

I marveled at him. How much he had changed. Although, I did see some hints of my little best friend in there. I smiled as he sped onto my street.

"Stop!" I yelled. He slammed on the brakes jerking only me forward.

"What?" he looked at me surprised.

"You can't drop me off at my house. I told my dad I was with Jake" I explained unbuckling myself. I could feel his eyes on me so I looked at him. He was smiling cheekily at me.

"What?" I said smiling back.

"It's still amazing to me how much you've changed. Your a woman. Not the little girl I left you as." He said brushing my bangs out of my face. "It's fascinating." I shook my head at him smiling. I loved him there was no denying it. I leaned over and kissed him lightly on the cheek.

"Bye, Edward." I said stepping out of the car and slamming the door behind me. I walked forward, feeling suddenly confident. He sped away and I found myself imagining things that I tooken woman should never imagine about another man.

* * *

**A/N**

**Okay everyone, this is my last chapter before my internet is no longer. This is very rushed. You see how long it is now and like I said this is rushed so I would have prefered it even longer. I staid up till 3:16 in the morning writing this so i hope you enjoy it. Please review. I love the feed back. It's the only reason i keep writing. Spelling may be bad. I didn't have the time nor energy to read it over. Thanks again. **


	6. Chapter 6 Shoking News

"What the hell do you mean you've missed a period!" Alice yelled at me over the phone.

"I mean, I'm over a week late, Alice" I said sitting down on my bed.

"Well, shit! What are we 'gunna do? You can't buy a test here, everyone knows anyone, it'll get back to Charlie." she was still yelling.

"Alice! Keep it down. There are other people in your house. Were gunna have to figure out how to get one, I guess."

"Wait! Hold on." I could hear her walking around as I waited "Yes! Bella, your in luck. So you know when Rose was staying here because of her family issues?"

"M-hmm. Whats your point?"

"Well, she stalked up on billions of different tests because she thought she was prego! I still have 2 tests in my bathroom."

"Your a life savor! I'll be over in a bit" I said already getting up and grabbing my keys. I headed down stairs, practically running. Charlie sat up on the couch.

"Wow, wheres the fire?" he said

"I'm going to Alice's. I'll be back in time to make dinner, Love you" I was already out of the door before he could reply. I jumped in my truck and roared it to life. My thoughts kept on roaming towards the possibilities. What ifs circled in my head making me dizzy. I pulled in front of the Cullen's house within the next 5 minutes and I ran for the door. Emmett was on the couch when I barged in. I waved on my way up the stairs. Keeping my eyes glued to my feet to keep my foot work I ran into a rock hard body. Edward caught me by the arms to keep me from falling.

"Bella!"He pulled me into a hug. It was impossible not to hug back. After he released me, I quickly kissed him on the cheek and kept on running up the stairs. Busting the door open, I was out of breath when I got to Alice's bathroom. She already had the two pregnancy tests out on the counter.

"Please tell me you have to pee?" she said as she saw me run in. I nodded as she handed me the sticks and shut the door behind her. After I was finished with my business, I got Alice and we sat in waited. For me it felt like an eternity. I felt like I was waiting to see if I would live or die. Alice put a hand on my shacking leg. The timer on her watch beeped twice. I didn't move a muscle.

"Bella, you gotta get up." she said looking at me cautiously. I took three breaths, stood, and walked to the counter. Closing my eyes, I grabbed them. I felt Alice's hand on my back.

"1 2 3..." she said and I opened my eyes. Those four pink lines were enough to make me faint. I went tumbling backwards onto the tile floor.

**APOV**

Bella hit the floor with a loud thud. I rushed to her as fast as I could. She was out cold. Debating weather er not to call Esme, I decided not to. Answers for question that I knew would come would be scares. I shook her lightly but her eyes didn't even flicker. Remembering the glass by my sink, I grabbed it and filled it with cold water. Not wanting to drowned her, I turned her on her side. She squealed as I emptied the cup on her face. She sat up quick and in the same instant berried her face in her hands. Her whole body trembled as she sobbed. My stomached clenched for her. I did the only thing I knew to do. Hold her. I wrapped my arms around her shoulders and rocked her back and fourth.

"H-how do I t-tell my dad?" she could barely get the words out.

"Maybe, you should tell Jake first." I suggested and she stiffened. I waited as she thought it through. She nodded as she pulled out her phone. I knew she wouldn't call him. She punched at the buttons on her phone. After she was done I guided her to my bed. Were she waited hours for a reply from Jake. When he failed to relieve her of her misery she eventually fell asleep. I came down the stairs to see Edward and Emmett on the couch watching the game. Edward looked at me with a wry expression. Emmett didn't seem to notice Edward distraction.

I kept moving into the kitchen. Edward came in in the next second. I sighed as he waited for an explanation.

"Alice, I know you, what's going on?" asked coming to sit on the counter next to me.

"She's just not well." He opened his mouth to protest and I thanked god when the phone rang. He jumped. Hopping off the counter I went for the phone by the fridge. I could feel Edward's eyes on my back. Choosing to ignore it I answered.

"Ah, Alice. Is Bella there?" Charlie came on over the receiver.

"Hey Charlie! Yeah, she's here but she totally crashed. I don't think she's been getting a lot of sleep."

"Oh okay good. I just wanted to let her know she didn't have to cook tonight. Sue's making dinner for me. And I wanted to let her know Harry and I are going for a little camping trip to go fishing. So she'll be alone in the house."

"She can stay here. I'll let her know, Charlie."

"Alright, thanks, Alice. Take care. Bye"

And for those to days Bella slept. She got up occasionally to use the bathroom. She never left the room. Not bothering to eat, she was sleeping so much. Many times I checked on her, to see if she was still breathing. Another thing that bothered me was that her phone hadn't gone off once. She didn't have any text or calls from Jake. I wasn't able to stop myself as I went to her sent box.

**Jake, I'm pregnant. We're having a baby. -Bella**

I decided to call him. Nothing unexpected, he didn't answer. Giving up, I grabbed my keys. I ignored my family as I walked out of the door to head to La Push. Jake's house was dark besides a lit that faded in and out from the living room. I assumed it was the TV. With confidence, I pounded on his door. The sound of Billy's wheelchair was unmistakable. He opened the door and rolled out a bit.

"Alice, so nice to see you" he greeted me with a smile.

I smiled back. "Same here, Billy. Is Jake here?" Billy's smile fell. I watched his expression change quickly into a depression.

"No, he left a note a couple of days ago. Said he had to go. That something happened and he couldn't stay here. I respect my son and trust he had a very good reason for leaving" he said crossing is hands in his lap. My jaw fell to the floor. Jacob left because Bella was pregnant. How could I tell Bella that. My heart hurt for her.

"Thanks Billy" I said staring past him at nothing. I drove home the same way. Dazed. I really didn't have a thought in my mind. When I got to the house I pulled into the garage and sat there. I probably would have sat there all night but Edward came out. He stared at me through the windshield before sliding into the passenger seat. I stayed silent still.

"She's awake and begging for food." he said smiling.

"Jake's gone, Eddy." I said pulling my gaze away from nowhere to stare at him.

"What do you mean he's gone?" he asked confused.

"He left. He left town. Because of Bella. I can't tell you why just because of something that has to do with her" I said tearing up

"No.." Edward said heating up. He slammed a fit down on the arm rest. I flinched away from him.

"Alice! How could he do that to her!" he donned his fist again. He swung the door open then. Stomping off. I followed after him.

"Edward, what are you doing?" I yelled after him

"I'm going to tell her" he shouted back

"At least let her eat first." I caught up to him and grabbed his arm

**BPOV**

I sat at the Cullen's dinning table scarfing down the food Alice and Edward made for me. Truly, I was still surprised that I slept two and a half day. Edward sat next to me, watching intently. I noted that he had his fist clenched. I'd have to ask him later. Alice was in her normal spot. Sitting on the counter by the fridge. At the moment I was trying to ignore the little thing I learned the other day. Stress was the last thing I wanted.

When I shoveled down the last bite of food Alice hopped down from the counter. She washed the plate and came over to sit on the other side of me. I watched as she shared a look with her brother. Edward began.

"Bella, we want to let you know were here. And I...we love you." I looked at Alice. Who shook her head that she hadn't told him.

"Jake didn't answer any of my calls. So I went to La Push." Alice said hesitantly.

"Jacob left, Bella." Edward said next. I stared at the both of them in confusion. I shook my head to myself. When I looked up my vision was blurred with teats.

"He left Billy a note saying something happened and he couldn't stay in forks anymore. All of his stuff is gone. Including the Rabbit." Alice eyed me. I ran. I ran out of there. Outside. Into the woods. I could hear them, faintly, calling after me. My tears still clouded my vision and I found it very difficult to see where I was going. The fact that it was night didn't help. My foot caught on something and I fell. I didn't have the courage to get u or move. I just curled into a ball and cried. I could hear Edward's voice coming closer. All I wanted to do was die. My heart hurt. I felt like someone stole my breath, no matter how much I sucking in for air it wouldn't come.

I was suffocating. Suddenly, the trees were to close. I was cramped into I small space. I squeezed my eyes shut. I begged God for death. I begged him to take me and my baby away. It was impossible to survive this and actually care for a baby.

"Bella!" Edward screamed from above me. I still didn't open my eyes. A pair of arms wrapped around me to a hard chest. _Edward. _I gripped his shit while he rocked me back and forth. I felt the Bella I was slipping away. My strength was drained and I was unable to catch it.

**EPOV**

I sat outside of Alice's door. Since I brought Bella back this is where I sat. So many questions were wondering through my mind. Alice was at Charlies now, explaining everything. Including a special thing I wasn't aloud to know. I knew my sister, and I knew she could get anything she wanted from Charlie. She had been gone 2 hours now. I was concerned, what if Charlie was so pissed about this "special thing" I wasn't aloud to know, that he killed my sister. I laughed at myself. Over exaggerating much? I heard the front door open but still refused to move. She came up the stairs half smiling.

"Yeah, I told him everything. Including the little secret. He was pissed. So he insist she stays here for awhile. He said she's going to need her friends. Also that he didn't think he'd have the patience with her. What with the secret and everything. Screaming at her would just make it worse." she came and sat next to me. "Edward, she'll be okay. She slept through out the whole night. No screams. Now, I have to call Jasper and cancel our date." she stood. I felt bad for my sister. She hadn't seen Jasper sense I've been home. 3 weeks that's crazy.

"Don't cancel you date. I'll be here with her anyway. I know how much you miss Jasper. You need to see him." I said. She smiled at me. I returned the favor and she began to walk down the stairs. I shrill scream came from the room. Within two seconds I was on my feet and in the room. Alice ran in after me. Bella was still screaming when I shook her awake. Tears fell from her face automatically. I nodded to Alice. Telling her to go get ready. Bella scooted over. I wasn't sure what she was going.

"Edward" she crocked patting the spot beside her. I crawled in, a little hesitant, next to her. I let her sob into my chest for hours. Once she was breathing heavily, I considered leaving but couldn't bring myself to get out of the bed. I couldn't count how many times I had fantasized about this. Maybe not under these circumstances but holding her. Right after we'd made love. She would lay asleep and I wouldn't because I wanted to watch her.

Watching her like this was anything but enjoyable. In fact, it was excruciating. Even in her sleep she was in pain. Her eyelids flickered back and forth as she worked her way through her, most likely, terrifying dream. I had to look away and at the ceiling. Before I knew it my own eyelids were heavy and I fell into a restless sleep.

The rest of the month was almost exactly the same. Countless times Bella woke up screaming. Alice and I took turns sleeping with her, Although, Alice was unable to stay the whole night with her. She claimed she didn't have the strength to listen to her sleep talk. She did start to get better, yes. She started to leave the room to eat and other things. Watch TV er something. But I hadn't seen her smile yet. I was very grateful it was summer because she would have been so far behind in school. I remembered the night she told me about the secret. I was asleep and she woke me up. She was moving my hand to her stomach.

I stiffened because I hadn't had a clue what she was doing. Her stomach felt firm and I had to fight back the urge to kiss her.

"I'm pregnant." she whispered in my ear.

I smiled at Bella as she came down the stairs. Her stomach was formed a little more sense she told me. She still didn't smile at me. It was normal.

"Good morning, Bella" I said meeting her halfway. "Oh and baby" he stared at me with an expression I didn't recognize.

"Breakfast?" she asked. I nodded and led her to the kitchen. Alice already had fixed eggs and bacon for Bella. She left about an hour ago to see Jasper. I plated up Bella, fed her and then we sat in silense.

"Edward," her voice caught me by surprise. "I wanted to thank you for all this. I know it isn't easy dealing with a grieving pregnant woman"

I smiled at her. Rising from my seat to walk over to her, caressed her belly. "It's alright, Bella. I would expect the same from you" I rubbed her belly gingerly. When I looked up at her, I realized she was watching me. Smiling at her I said,

"This baby's going to have the best, bright, beautiful mommy in the world"

It was then that I saw it. Bella smiled at me. It was a such a marvelous sight to see. Really, it felt as if I hadn't seen her breath taking smile in years. I was in love with Bella Marie Swan.

* * *

**A/N**

** For some wonderful reason, my internet is still alive. I absolutely love this chapter. It was definately the most fun to write. Again Bare with me. Family issues. My brother and I got into a physical fight. I also wanted to thank my reviewers. you guys are fantastic. I wil keep writing for me(: Please tell me what you think of this one. -Mariah**


	7. Chapter 7 Moving On?

"No, no," I laughed "in all seriousness, how many girls did you date in China." Edward laughed at me before answering.

"Bella, I dated all of 3 girls in a span of five years." we had been talking for hours. My legs were in his lap and we were planted on the white couch. I eyed him curiously. He knew what I meant.

"Only one was serious." he said seriously.

In the same tone of seriousness I asked. " Tell me about her?" Edward sighed. I could tell he was deep in thought. Detailed lines formed in his forehead.

"Her name was Mica. She wasn't originally from China. A exchange student like me. I met her the first year I went. We had first period together. The teacher sat me next to her. At first she didn't seem to notice me. I was 13 and she was a year older. Funny," he seemed to drift back "I remember being so intimidated. I asked her out. We went on a few dates and that was it. Two whole years. I was fifteen, when she went back to Alaska." he looked at me with pained eyes. They reminded me of my own.

"You loved her." I didn't say it as a question. He nodded. I felt my pain coming back. The memory of Jake flooded my mind. It'd been 2 months sense he left. 2 months sense I'd seen my father. Sense I left the house. My pain must have been effecting the baby because it kicked. I rubbed my stomach

.

"It's okay baby" I cooed to my belly. Edward smiled at me, crookedly. My stomach was engorged, four months pregnant. It was silent in the house. Esme, Carlisle, Emmett, and Rose went to Port Angelas for a premier. Movies were the last thing on my mind. Alice went out with Jasper to dinner. Edward offered to stay with me. I was grateful for him. If he hadn't staid, I would have sat and thought. Not the best thing for me now.

"Bella..." my name came out as I whisper. I looked at him. He was closer now. Maybe only a foot away.

"Yes, Edward?" I said nervous.

"I love you" he didn't mean it they way he said it when we were little kids. He meant it they way I always wished him to mean it. But now, it just hurt me. I stood up fast. Before I knew it I was pacing.

"Why? Why, Edward, couldn't you have told me that years ago, before you left. Why did you wait until I was broken. You could have said it then and all of this would never have happened. I wouldn't be pregnant before marriage, I wouldn't have been in pain over Jake leaving me. I hate you. I hate you for making me breakdown like-" Edward rose as fast as I had. Grabbing my face between his hands, he pressed his lips hard to mine. I was amazed at how different it was kissing Edward. It was easy kissing Jake. I had to work at it with Edward. My mind spun and I found it difficult to breath.

I enjoyed the feeling of being light headed and enjoyed it even more when I thought about it coming from him. Edward had been the center of my fantasy's for years. Until I met Jake, he was all I dreamed about. Now, finally living it and kissing him, I mentally kicked myself in the head for not making a move sooner. My whole body was on live wire.

He pulled away all to soon. I hadn't noticed, but the baby was attacking my insides. It kicked fiercely. Quickly, I grabbed his hand and pressed it against my stomach. At first he seemed stunned. Soon his expression shifted into pure fascination. Once the baby calmed down he looked down at me. Again he dipped low and kissed me. I thought I couldn't breathe before but when he licked my lip and bit it lightly, I thought I would faint. He noticed my hard time and retracted, keeping our foreheads attached .

"Bella..." he repeated like earlier.

"Hmm?" I hummed out, still a little dazed to form words.

"I love you, and I would like your permission to help take care of this baby" he said closer to my lips again

"Of course. I love you, Edward."

**APOV**

Jasper drove us to the highest point in Port Angelas to watch the sun go down. Hours ago that had happened but we both decided we weren't ready to leave. We sat in the back seat talking for who knows how long.

"I suppose you've gotten the word around about the proposal?" he asked toying with a strand of my hair.

"Yeah, Esme is almost to excited. She 'gunna help plan things"

"Bella, how's she doing?" he asked serious.

I shook my head unable to know for sure " Better. She eats, at least. She's gotten bigger. I like the baby look on her. If she smiled every once in a while."

" About Bella. I was thinking we should wait until she has the baby to start planning the wedding. I mean, I'm sure Bella doesn't want the whole graduated class knowing she's pregnant. Plus you'll have more time to plan. " he said cautious

"That's 5 months plus recovery. Mom and I already picked out a date" it came out as I whine

"Yes but, Alice, think about Bella. She's under so much stress. After the baby's born she'll be so busy plus she has to deal with the whole collage thing." once he put it that way I understood. I didn't want Bella to suffer anymore than she already was. She couldn't live with us forever. Especially after the baby is born. Jasper and I would be moving out in a week. Something I had yet to break to Bella. She couldn't necessarily live with us. It was a 2 room apartment. And a screaming baby wouldn't help anything.

Don't get me wrong, I would do anything for Bella but I had many things to think about also. The wedding, collage, and a job. There was the option of moving back home but even I wouldn't want to do that, when it came to the situation she was in. On the ride home I couldn't stop thinking about all these things. It wasn't until Jasper pulled in front of my house that I rendered the fact that it had been at least an hour of that kind of thought. The car wasn't home meaning everyone wasn't back from the movie.

Another thought popped into my brain. I glanced at the dashboard. The clock read 2:30 a.m. Their movie must just now be getting over. I gave Jasper I quick goodbye kiss and started into the house. Before I got to the door something caught my eye in the window. Bella's head was in Edward's lap. That not being the thing surprising me of course. She was laughing. Bella wasn't just smiling but she was full on laughing till you cry. It was difficult, but I forced my gaze toward Edward. He was laughing but keeping a firm eye on her as he did so. The way he stared made me smile. It was pure adornment.

I looked at Bella again who was clutching her baby bump. It was nice seeing some shape on her, really. She was 2 months pregnant when she found out and was 4 months now. Taking once last look, I opened the door. They both looked my way, still laughing. I rushed over to the couch.

"Bella! It's so nice to see you laughing again!" I knelt down and hugged her belly, gaining another laugh from the both of them. 10 minutes later they retired to the room and I made my normal bed on the couch. Exhausted, I drifted fast.

**The next morning- BPOV**

Alice had us sat comfortably on her bed, ready for the talk she said we needed to have. We were both still in our pj's do to our late nights. Alice looked pained, making a knot in my stomach appear.

"Jasper and I are moving in together next week. It's an apartment. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, Bella. I just don't know where you were 'gunna go and still don't"

I looked at her surprised then chuckled "Alice, I don't know if you noticed but me and Edward are kinda, I don't know, dating? And if something goes wrong with that I can just go home and deal with Charlie. It isn't a big deal. It's not like I thought you were gunna live here forever, even after you married. Oh and speaking of Charlie, I forgot to tell you that he called. Asked if I would want to go to the diner and have dinner with him. I asked to bring Edward. So, yeah, that's tonight"

Alice and I talked for hours after that. She told me everything I missed within my 2 month depression. Which I have to admit, still hurt badly, although Edward started to fill the void. Before I knew it it was already 3 and I had to start getting ready. We had to meet Charlie at five. Alice, like she used to, helped me get ready. She chose a blue tank top, which she noted we needed to go shopping for hot mommy cloths, with black dress sweats. Another half hour for hair and makeup and I was done. Edward waited for me down stairs. Being Edward he wanted to be early. We were at the restaurant 5 minutes before Charlie.

Charlie cleared his throat as he approached. I stood up to give him a look I knew he wanted. Once he caught sight of my belly his eyes widened. I fought hard to ignore the other gasps from the by standers in the diner. Charlie gave me a quick hug before taking his seat. It didn't take not even 5 minutes for things to get awkward. I figured I'd attempt trying to get him to be interested in Edward.

"Dad, you remember Edward" I said signaling toward the perfect guy sitting next to me.

"Yeah, went to China for that school didn't 'cha?" he asked seeming bored.

"Yes, sir, I did. May I say it is a pleasure to see you again" Edward stretched a hand across the table. Charlie looked at it as if it was a decease. I was applaud by how rude my dad was being.

"So you and Bella are dating, huh? Isn't that a little fast to be getting over Jake, the father of your child?" My heart felt like it was ripped out of my chest. I felt the pain of Jake leaving all over again. My eyes began to water and I considered running out.

"With all do respect, chief Swan, I think that that comment was unnecessary. Bella is going through a hard time. You really shouldn't make it sound like you are accusing her of being heartless because, yes, she does still hurt about it, but is it wrong to feel loved after you've been hurt. I also wouldn't be so quick to defend Jake, sir, he is the one who left her" Edward chimed in just as fast putting an arm around my shoulder.

I looked at my dad for his reaction. He looked stunned. I'm sure out of his whole time working as a cop that someone had never spoken to him that way. I also looked for any sign of anger which I didn't find. He actually looked remorseful. The rest of the time we ate in silence and I was caught of guard when Charlie spoke on our way out.

"Bella, I wanted to apologize. I know your hurting and going through a stressful time. I should have never said anything like I did back there. If it changes anything, you look gorgeous, pregnant and all." I knew it took all of Charlie strength to do that and I applauded him for it. I automatically went for a hug. In my fathers arms I felt the most content, sense Jake left, knowing my father and I were at good terms, Edward and I drove home happy.

* * *

**A/N**

**Heyy y'all. Another big thanks to all the reviewers. hope you liked the chapter. Any ideas on the next. I'm a lil stumped. Alice moving out or a shoping trip. Something else maybe? 'lemme know. REVIEW**


	8. Chapter 8 A choice in the matter ?

I still dream about Jacob, I don't think that will ever change. Mostly about him packing his bags by himself, trying to get away as quick as possible. Before I could stop him from leaving. Stuffing his bags with the contents of his drawers. Him silently slipping out his front door. A hooded figure in the darkness of the night. That's what I woke up to this morning. His haunting image. I had trained myself not to scream now. I just silently cry, trying not to disturb Edward's slumber.

Edward is to quick though. He doesn't miss a beat, just sits up and quietly wraps his pale arms around me. I let myself lean into his embrace and finish my morning routine. This was normal, almost everyday. It all ended the same as well, Edward would wipe away my tears and kiss my cheeks and then we continue with our day, trying to ignore my pain. Of course he made me happy, but that didn't seem to be enough for my constant brain that would seem to let me give Jacob up. We walked down the stairs together, and there on the beautiful white sofa sat Esme and Alice, balls deep in wedding planning. Excuse the metaphor but it was the only one that best explained the moment.

"Good morning. " They both cooed to us.

We mumbled our replies and Edward headed to the kitchen. I went to take a seat next to them. They were looking at decoration magazines, comparing opinions.

"Bella, what do you think would be good colors, pink and yellow, or brown and blue ? " Alice confided.

To tell you the truth I didn't have a clue. This wedding stuff was all crazy for me. I would just be happy with going to a court house. What's the point of thousands of dollars and months of planning for 4 hours of fun ?

"I don't know Alice, what does Esme think ? " I asked

"I think she should just do black and white, to match her dress. Maybe throw in some zebra print ? " Esme said.

That was actually a bright idea. God, she was talented.

"Well, that doesn't matter right now, cause today is all about you Bella. I have decided we are going on a shopping trip in Port Angelas . And then you and Edward will have dinner date after ward." Alice said brilliantly.

"Do I even have a say in the matter ? " I glared.

She replied with a simple "nope" and moved to help me up and for a pixie like her, that was quite the challenge. Esme had to help as well.

"You know Bella for almost 5 months, I don't recall being this big. " Esme said.

"Me niece or nephew is just a fast grower" Alice said smiling at me.

Apparently Edward was already in on this little plan of Alice's. So I was rushed to go start getting ready. Is already getting hard to bend over, I almost couldn't turn on the shower. I wanted to cry, I was a fat cow and it was only going to get worse. I stripped my stretched out cloths off and quickly jumped in the shower to avoid the cold. The hot water relaxed my muscles. Normally, I take my time in the shower but after 5 minutes in Alice was screaming through the shut door. I hated being rushed. In my hurry to be enveloped in the hot water of a shower I forgot to get a towel. Alice's bathroom was huge, meaning the towels were on the opposite side of the shower. _Great !_ I said to myself, as I hopped out of the shower and tip toed my way to the shower.

"Alright, alright, Emmett, I'm getting you TP. Calm down. " I heard through the now opening door.

I began to panic as Edward's shirtless figure appeared. He was beyond explaining gorgeous. He froze for a moment taking my sight in. I felt repulsive, already 28 pounds more that my original weight. His eyes didn't show even a hint of disgust as he took me in. I was halfway to feeling sexy. He inched forward, closer and closer. He stopped inches away from me, if it wasn't for my belly we'd be chest to chest. I wanted to put my hands all over him.

Slowly, he lowered his face to mine, pausing just before my lips. I tasted his warm breath. Like me, he took in my scent and moaned the tiniest bit. Then he planted a _very_ chased kiss on my lips, pulling back after wards. Without taking his eyes off me now, he reach inside the cabinet and pulled out a towel. Gingerly, he wrapped it around my still wet body. He also grabbed a role of toilet paper. With that he smiled and exited the room. What had come over me, why in this cruel world would I think Edward would ever consider being intimate with me ? I was a fat cow. **Repulsive. **

While getting dressed and drying my hair this is what my thoughts consisted of. I could really beat myself up when I wanted to. No wonder Jake didn't want to be with me. I had questioned it before ? I was stupid. My baby growled at me, I hadn't eaten today. I didn't want to, it would just make me fatter.

Almost like she read my mind Alice came in the bedroom with a plate of food. French toast and bacon. It smelt wonderful. Only because my baby needed it, I scarfed down my fat girl sized breakfast.

"Kay, I'll be down in the car, Alice said pulling on her coat. Hurry up and say your goodbyes. " she smiled and headed down the stairs. I could hear Emmett down the hall playing his video games. He was a very avid player. Just as I had expected, Edward stood at his brother's doorway, smiling in. I was almost ashamed seeing him. Would it be awkward or something ? As he saw me approaching his face lit up and he pushed off the door frame. I gave a wiry smile.

"You look excited. "he commented.

"A whole day of trying on cloths that don't fit. Ecstatic."

He pulled me into him chuckling. Again, my baby bump got in the way of us. I hid my face in his bare chest.

"I'm sorry about earlier," I whispered, " if I would have known you didn't want to.." I trailed off.

He chuckled again. "You thought I didn't want to ? " he pulled away to look at me.

"Of course, I'd would have loved to make you _shake _with pleasure, but it wasn't the right time to think about that. " he smiled seductively.

I was shaking now. The thought of it had me melting into a cloud of happiness and Edward knew it. He kissed jaw and descended to the corner of my lips. He plated a kiss there as well.

"Have a good day, I'll see you at 6 " he whispered against my lips.

And the whole ride to Port Angelas, I was lost in very deep thoughts of Edward and I...

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**A/N**

**Hey guys, I'm back. So excited that I am finally capable of uploading a new chapter. This is when it all starts to get good. Please review it encourages me to keep going 3 **


	9. Chapter 9 Ghost

Mommy 2 B is a very high end maternity store, apparently very popular because it was over crowded.

I've never shopped so much in my life. We've been to pedicures and hair already. Now it was time for overpriced baby bump cloths. Alice say pregnancy was all about comfort. My life now consisted of jeans with elastic waist bands. The clerk couldn't believe I was only 4 and a half months said I could passed for a small seven months. You could guess how good that made me feel. Alice, always looking on the bright side, says at least I have some curves now. Which is very true. I had gone up a whole cup size and could even say I have an ass now.

I wouldn't expect pregnant woman to want to look sexy but I guess they do, cause Alice handed me a lot of scary looking tops and skirts. That meant I have to shave my legs, I don't like doing that these days. I had about 10 outfits now. I was only aloud one lazy looking outfit, my personal shopper says. Great. I had to admit, the cloths were comfortable for their look.

Currently, I was trying on a sun dress. I've never warn a dress in my life. So why did I like it on me so much ? I really liked it. It pooled out enough to hide my bump a little bit.

"Bella ! You wont believe what I've found ! It's perfect for tonight." she slipped it over the door.

/r/25zhx5y/7 **[Imagine this with enough room for a baby bump ^.^]**

I didn't even know they made stuff like this for pregnant woman. It was beautiful, and expensive. I was careful sleeping it on. I didn't want to ruin it. I opened the stall for Alice to zip me up, and then I looked at myself if the mirror. My mouth dropped to the floor. I've never seen myself like this. It fit perfectly, hugging in the right parts and loose enough for my baby.

"Oh, Bells. You have to get it " Alice said beaming. She knelt next to my belly. "You and your mommy look so pretty. Do you think mommy should get it ?"

My baby was so smart because it kicked away. Alice gave me a ya-see kinda look. I laughed, continuing to marvel. As long as I didn't have to wear heels I was good with getting it. Alice picked out some flat with a bit of a rise. With that and a bracelet we were ready to check out. I didn't want to look at the total. I hated that The Cullen's spent money on me. I could get a job for the next 6 months. They insist though. I only excepting it today because I was in dire need of cloths that fit. 6 bags later I was pretty sure we were ready to leave, but I was wrong.

Borrowing a chair from the waiting room we went to the enormous bathroom.

"Now, do you have to use the rest room before I start ? " she asked.

I huffed, were getting ready here. I might as well pee, this would take a while. She sat me in the chair and began. Somewhere in the time of the curling iron heating up I drifted to sleep. I hadn't had a nap today. It was killing me ! She did her magic, while I didn't cooperate. She shook me lightly when she was done. I didn't recognize myself in the mirror. This curly haired rosy cheek girl was gorgeous, she wasn't me.

"My god Alice. Your a miracle worker." I was whispering.

"Not even Bella, you have all the basic material, I just brought it out." she smiled.

Damned pregnancy, I started to cry. I practically fell on Alice. She was trying not to laugh, I could tell.

I would laugh too. This was ridiculous. When people tell you pregnancy makes a person glow, it's a lie. There is nothing about it that is fun. So why would us pregnant folk glow ?

"Now stop crying ! You'll mess up your make up." Alice pulled me off her.

She handed me my dress a long with a matching bra and thong. I stared at her in horror. This was scary. Major push up much? I've worn a thong like two times in my whole life. She just pushed me in the stall. I put on the atrocious things. I was so pushed up I couldn't see my baby. Scarier than scary. I continued on being brave and carefully slipped the dress over my head. Alice did her smoothing out and zipping up.

She stole a picture of me holding my baby smiling. We did look beautiful.

"You go out to the car, I'll pack things up real quick." She said.

I complied, well, I tried. I almost made it, I was only a couple feet away from the door when I caught a familiar smell. I stopped abruptly. Even with her back to me, I could recognize that hair anywhere. My stomached churned. She was looking through tops, non nonchalantly.

"Rebecca ?" I crocked.

She turned around and I thought I'd vomit. If Jacob was a woman...

"Bella ! Look at you !" she said automatically hugging me.

There was that smell again, his smell...

"You look great !" she smiled. I was still unable to form words. I was scared I would just end up crying.

"Um," she said awkwardly "how far along are you ?" she asked.

"F-four and a half months" I half blurted out.

"Really? Your huge, I'm 6 and your bigger than me" it wasn't meant as an insult but it felt as much.

I smiled. "So your in town ?

"Yeah, dad and Sue are throwing me a baby shower. Rachel is down too " she might be the exception of 'glowing'.

"Is... Jacob going? " I asked, I couldn't help it.

"We haven't heard from him in about a month." totally serious now "It's his isn't it?" she glanced at my stomach. All I could do was nod. She nodded to, understanding. Alice came then.

"Oh Rebecca !" she pulled her into a hug "How are you?" she asked

She said a little surprised. "I'm great. Doing really well."

Alice noticed my face expression and took control.

"We'd love to stay and chat but we're already late to a prior engagement. So sorry." she grabbed my arm.

"Well, wait !" She called.

Alice stopped us quickly.

"Everybody would love it if you would come to the baby shower. I'll give you my number." She rummaged through her purse and quickly jotted down a number. "That's my husband Samuel's number. They'd be happy to see you." she said give us a sincere smile. With that, Alice towed me out of the door.

In the safety of the car, I finally let myself cry. Alice didn't stop me this time. Just held me and I went through shudders of pain. If I couldn't manage that how could I see all of them again. I couldn't go. I wouldn't. This is to much stress.

"Be strong Bella. For the baby." she wiped away my tears.

Going in her purse she pulled out a compact of powder. With it she quickly fixed my cheeks. I was in a daze all over again. Seeing Rebecca put me back in my cold depressed state. I didn't want to go to dinner, but Alice was right, all this wasn't good for a my child. I composed myself for Alice, I would only cry while I was alone. Sneak another shower tonight.

* * *

Edward was waiting outside the restaurant. When I saw him reality was gone. He was standing casually on the steps in a gray suit. He was to good to be true. The baby felt like it was using all fours to let me know my heart rate was up. Edward was my happy drug, I had been going through with drawls all day, now all I wanted to do was get high...

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**A/N**

**Who's ready for some Edward and Bella bonding time ? I know I am. Still deciding on topics for it. Any ideas ? REVIEW.**


	10. Chapter 10 Port Angles

Edward smiled while helping me out of the car.

"Absolutely breath taking." he whispered stooping low to my ear.

Breath taking couldn't even half way explain him. I couldn't think of a word that could. A million words out together wouldn't do a justice. So why bother. He stuck his head in the car and thanked Alice. I now looked at the restaurant. It was huge; very quaint looking. I understood now why this dress was appropriate. Taking my hand he lead me up the lit up stairs. Just before the doors he stopped us. He pressed his lips to forehead.

"I don't think you understand how utterly beautiful you are, Isabella Marie Swan." he said.

My full name, coming from those lips, I didn't think he knew how utterly beautiful _that sounded. _I felt my cheeks flush, all I could do is shake my head. He opened the glass door for me and I stepped in cautiously. At the front desk a woman waited for us. She was the definition of hot. She could pass as prettier than Rosalie. Blonde hair, curly, hung just above her butt. She wore uniform black pants that could barely contain her ass. I watched with jealousy as she lead us to our table.

We were seated by the window, where you could see all of Port Angelas. I hadn't noticed before where Alice had brought me. The restaurant looked over everything. It was dark now and the city lights lit up everything. It was almost breath taking, though a small place, bigger than forks, it had many things to offer here, along with it's evergreen beauty. I wouldn't lie, I loved where I lived, I loved my small town and traveling to a small-but-bigger-than-the-last town for fun.

"Beautiful isn't it ? " he asked, interrupting my thoughts.

I turned back to him and smiled. "It is." I said.

"Nothing compared to you of course." he reached across for my hand.

Blushing, I pulled my hand out from underneath the table and placed it in his. He turned to look out the window now.

"It's sad also, don't you think ?" I looked at him in confusion. "That man finds what's causing our own down fall lovely."

I nodded in agreement. Man loved things made by man. I studied Edward's face, that had yet to return to my direction. I often found myself wondering about what he could be thinking, like now. He was gorgeous in deep thought. It was as if he had drifted into a far away place, not even close to here. Reality. I thought about what that place may be. My intent stare one him shook him from his trance. He gave a small smile. Just then our waitress came.

She was short, in her sixties with red hair. It was in tight curls on her head. She looked as if she might have been pretty if the years hadn't warn on her. She was pretty now. Like everyone else she wore black pants and a white shirt. I started to ponder why she may work here. In her early sixties? Isn't that passed retirement these days?

"Hey kiddo's, can I get y'all drink." she asked with a cute southern slang. I already admired her.

She had a loving grandma way about her. It made me miss Gran. It'd been months since I've thought about her, I missed her now. Edward looked at me questioningly.

"I'll have an Italian soda. Raspberry ?" I said.

Edward half smiled. "I'll have the same."

She wrote that down and looked back at us. "Comin' right up."

She went to turn as if she'd leave but stopped. Looking between us, she smiled.

"I know it's probably not my place," she began, "but it's real nice seein' such a lively young couple in here. And again, it's not my place, but girl," she directed this toward me, "I haven't seen a man look at a woman like that since my husband died."

I thought I adored her before, I loved her. She made us chuckle a bit. Edward just looked at me, not ever removing his eyes. It made me blush, a deep scarlet red. He noticed too. With a wink my way she headed to get our drinks. I watched her until she disappeared into the back.

"Bella?" Edwards voice was soft, affectionate.

"Yes, Edward?" I asked looking him in the eye.

"When you and Alice first arrived, you looked as if you had seen a ghost, even a little confused. What were you thinking about" he seemed to think back to it, also confused.

I couldn't look at him, only at my hands now under the table. Closing my eyes, I breathed in deeply. It took me a moment but I willed myself to look at him and speak.

"We ran into Rebecca at the store..." I trailed off.

He looked shocked and genuinely concerned. Nothing came out right away but he seemed to try and make light of the situation. His smile seemed forced.

"That's great. How is she? Haven't seen her in forever."

Oh, how I remembered our childhood days. Alice, Jacob, Rebecca, Rachel, and me. I always thought Rachel and Edward would end up together, before he left. They always seemed the closest. Though only 1 minute apart in birth, Rachel and Rebecca are so different. Rachel was the rebellious type. Didn't like to do anything Billy said. Billy like there hair long, I remember being down at the rez, Rachel and Billy were screaming at each other about the tribes traditions, girls kept there hair long. Billy threatened that she wasn't a true tribe member. She stomped her way to the kitchen grabbed a pair of scissors and started cutting. By the time she was done her hair was no longer than her law line. Edward liked her boldness. And I envied that.

"Bella?" Edward's voice bounced along my memory lane.

"Oh, uh, Rebecca is having a baby." I said it like a zombie.

"Oh? Wow. Is she here to visit Billy?" He asked.

"Sue Clearwater is throwing her a baby shower. We were invited."

He thought for a moment. "Did you want to go, love?"

I thought now. Could I handle going down there. I could barely see Rebecca without like a whole had been punched through my chest. It could also be what I needed to move on. If I brought Edward, I could do it, right? If I got uncomfortable, I could always leave.

"I...don't know. It's just like...I'm climbing a mountain and somehow I loose my footing and slip right back into Jake's empty hands." I shook my head, trying to keep away tears. Edward came around the table and sat next to me. He took me in his arms. Everything felt better here. I wasn't going to cry tonight. This was supposed to be special. I put my face in his neck and sighed. I could die like this.

"Thank you." I whispered gingerly placing my lips right on his jugular. I could feel his pulse rhythmically beating against them. I didn't have to see to know he was grinning widely.

" No need to thank me, Bella." he said looking down at me. I just wanted to live in his grass green eyes. Everything seemed content there. He kept one arm around my shoulder and mine were around his waist. Slowly he lowered his lips to mine. His breath brushed them lightly and I shivered in pleasure. Just then our waitress came with our drinks.

"Okay, here ya' go kiddos," she said setting them down, once she took in our position she began to stutter "A-are ya' ready to order?"

Edward only sat up, not seeming bothered. I hadn't really looked at food. Edward looked at my quizzically. I shrugged.

"Can we both have the mushroom ravioli?" Edward asked. She jotted that down.

"Is that all?" she looked up.

"Yes. That is all." he answered.

"Kay. We'll have that out in a jiff." with that she disappeared again.

As soon as she turned her back Edward returned to his previous position. Just before kissing me, he smiled at my gasp. His lips moved cautiously against mine. PDA wasn't ever much of my thing, but with Edward, there was just to much going on. But like a gentleman he didn't let it get out of hands, he pulled away resting his forehead on mine.

"It's still so mind blowing, knowing I can do that." he whispered, eyes closed. "God, I want to do so much more than that."

I shuddered at the thought of more than that. _Want to...so much more than that...that I can do more that...that I can do that. _It kept echoing over and over in my head. Could he do so much more than that? I was only for months, the deadline could be soon. The worst has already happen. All that thought was getting overwhelming, I pulled away quickly. Edward didn't seem surprised or hurt. More like relieved.

In time our food came, and Edward returned to his seat opposite of me. Leaving me feeling cold. We laughed about childhood memories. It probably seemed normal to the outside world, a really happy couple. Good thing nobody every tired to look deeper because just beyond our fragile surface was our slow closing cracks. Now they were barely visible, even to me. They opened and closed a lot these days. Just as I thought they were mostly closed things had to change for the worse. After it had started to grow silent waiting for desert that I was mouth watering for Edward pulled a envelope from his jacket pocket and laid it in front of me.

Picking it up I asked, "What's this?"

"It's an acceptance letter for Alaska state." He smiled.

I looked at him in shock, my first reaction was to congratulate him than everything hit me. Is that what this dinner was about, was he telling me he was leaving in the fall, leaving me, leaving here, leaving everything? The cracks were now gaping holes. Edward took in my expression and just about panicked.

"Bella? Bella, are you alright?" he was at my side again.

"What's this m-mean for us?" I managed.

He looked at me and I saw hope there. "I was hoping you would come with me in the fall."

All I could do was stare. This was a lot to be happening. So much stress on the baby lately. My smart little one kick then, and I took that as comfort.

"Carlisle and Esme lived there once, they have a home down there near the college as well. It would be a house to ourselves." he said excited, "I also have relatives down there. They would give me a job."

"What do Carlisle and Esme think?" I asked.

This was all so crazy, move away from Forks? I've lived here pretty much my whole life.

"They thought it would be a great idea." he paused, "I understand that this all has been difficult for you, but, Bella, It doesn't mean you shouldn't live your life. And this would be a big transaction in only 2 months, all I am asking is that you think about it. I don't have to go if you don't feel comfortable."

I nodded. Apparently, I had a lot of thinking to do soon. Almost to much on my shoulders right now. I caressed my beach ball stomach. _We _had a lot of thinking to do. I wanted to do what's right for my little one, and maybe this could be it. I had neglected it these first months. So selfish on my own pain. Did I need an ultra sound thingy before the first 5 months. And if I did, It mustn't been important because Carlisle, the doctor, didn't say anything. I looked up then. Edward was staring at me adoringly.

"Have you thought of names?" he asked.

"I have thought of a girls one." I blushed a deep red.

He noticed my obvious embarrassment and asked, "What?"

"I was thinking," pause "Edward and Bella combined...like Ella" I said looking down, red faced.

But when all I heard was silence, I looked up in surprise. His reaction wasn't expected. He almost looked sad. Mostly confused.

"What is it ?" I asked, cautious.

He waited a while to answer. Trying to look for a way not to upset me. I'm sure.

"Don't you think the child should know about..." **pause** "Jacob?"

I couldn't help my reaction. For once his name didn't cause me pain. Only anger. I waited a moment to compose myself.

"It'll know about the _dog_. The baby will know that he isn't here, and that you are. And if this child takes it upon his or her free will to find it's father, than that is it's choice. I would support them in every step of the way but will not contribute in the findings."

I found myself breathing hard after this. I was also left wondering if that last part was true. My brain told me it was but my heart defied me. Could I handle it if my baby did find him ? I could remain with Edward, happy, right ? I mean here he was, after all of this, still sitting across from me, while I pondered my life. Not knowing if I am actually capable of moving on. I was so afraid of hurt now. I felt like all these last couple of months have been based on is fear.

"Bella," he said, reaching across and putting a gentle hand on my cheek "I didn't mean to upset you. Whatever you wish, love."

His voice was so soothing and I was back to my gaga mood. Our waitress returned then with our check. I didn't dare reach for it. The thought of how much this all could have cost was enough to make me nauseous. Edward quickly glanced it and reach for his wallet. While opening it, before taking out the money, he glanced up at me.

"Do you need to use the restroom before we go?" He cocked an eyebrow.

He knew how all this money crap bugged me and was kindly asking me to leave. I nodded and waddled out of my chair. Before I was to far, I felt a cold hand grasp my wrist. I turned and Edward was standing. He half smiled and kissed me on the cheek before letting go. When I was out of his site, my hand came to rest at the still tingling spot on my cheek. I didn't quite know where the bathroom was but I also was very concerned at the moment.

The bathroom was eventually found. Edward eventually found_ me_. We pulled out of the restaurant in the next 5 minutes. Since my pregnancy, Edward calmed his driving a bit. Only because it caused stress, he said, other wise, he was the best driver in the world. I smiled at the thought. Watching out the window as Port Angles passed us by, I sighed.

My sigh was caught in my throat when we passed the theater. A memory invaded my sight. Jacob and I sat outside after a movie, his large arms were wrapped around me. I bared my face his chest, taking in his husky smell. It was a cold night as he sway our bodies back and forth. I sighed as his lips came to my ear. He was so warm.

"Your perfect."he whispered. From there his voice morphed into Edward's, echoing in my ears.

I was back in the car again and being spoken to. I looked at Edward as a tear fell from my cheek.

"Bella, your crying. What's wrong?" he asked surprised.

I wiped my tears away quickly, "Nothing." I smiled. "Did you say something?"

He cocked and eyebrow for a moment. Clearly not convinced. He continued anyways.

"Should we stop by for a visit at Charlie's? Maybe invite him to an ultra sound?" He asked.

I pondered that for a moment. Sighing, I laid my head on the rest and looked out the window.

"Let's go see Charlie." I said.

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**AN**

**Sorry this took so long :/ Won't have to wait as long for the next one. Review. **


	11. Chapter 11 Too much for one night

I tried not to show how tired I was. It was a hard fight. The lull of the tires against pavement hushing me to sleep. Why I didn't want to show how truly exhausted I was, I am not quite sure. Maybe it had something to do with my pride. I may be pregnant, but I sure as hell was the same. A baby, born or not, couldn't take away _me,_ could it ?

The ride back wasn't long at all. Thanks to Edward's insistent ability to drive fast. Before or knew it, or was even prepared for it, we sat in front of Charlie's house. Edward's steady hand brushed my cheek as I sat frozen, scared. Which bugged me. I was just going to see my father. Who I just saw 2 or 3 days ago ? I was very insistent on making it a bigger deal than it was, then.

A sweet _you can do this_ from Edward's lips as he slipped out of the car and to my side. He opened my door and despite my efforts to persuade him other wise, helped me out, which sounds less difficult than it truly is. All dressed up waiting on my father's doorstep, I realize how weird it is to be knocking on this door. There once was I time I could just walk in, plop my bags down, and sit on the couch with Charlie. The memory hurt. It seemed nothing would ever stop reminding me of the life I once had.

I took a deep breath as Charlie slowly cracked open the door. "Oh hey, Bells." he paused, "What are you doing here?"

Ouch. That hurt. He wouldn't even let me in. His whole face wasn't even showing. _Be strong Bella._

"We just stopped to talk." his face softened a bit, "Can we come in?" I didn't sound as strong as I had hopped.

He seemed to think for a minute. His eyes not connecting with mine or even looking my way.

"Could you hang on a sec? I kind of have a surprise for you." he said, almost guilty.

I nodded and he shut the door. My mind touched so many areas so quickly I began to feel a bit dizzy.

Edward put a hand on the small of my back and leaned close to my ear to gently whisper.

"I do believe your father may have a woman over?" I could hear the smile in his voice.

"What?" I turned to him, not bothering to whisper. "What makes you think that?"

He seemed puzzled by my reaction at first. "Just a guess."

Charlie swung the door open, actually smiling now.

"Okay, Bells, I want you to come in the kitchen. Someone's here"

He wasn't just smiling, he was ecstatic. I tried looking past him, in which he backed up inviting us in with a gesture. By the stairs that I had climbed a million times, sat 3 suitcases. For a moment my heart fluttered. How many possibilities could there be. I walked very slowly, Charlie already disappeared in front of me. Edward had a firm grip around my waist. A fact I was thankful for as I slowly rounded the corner.

There, standing next to my dad, the last person I ever expected, was my mother. Tan and in shorts. Which explained the temperature. I was sweating already. Her smile, one I haven't seen in years, was warm but unusually cold. I felt nothing for it. Then, painfully obvious, I saw my fathers arm snug around her waist. I was halfway to going crazy when Edward's hand gently squeezed my hip.

"Hello, Bella" she said, her eyes trailing to my stomach. Which seemed to make her light up with pride.

I just starred at her, astonished. Could this really be happening?

Charlie cleared his throat, "Bella, your mom has decided to move back with us."

"Why?" I blurted.

They both seemed uneasy now.

"Your mother and Phil are no longer together.-" Rene cut him off.

"Let's just say, that in the end, I knew where I had to go." she said.

I think they may have expected me to be happy? Actually, I was the opposite than that. My dad believed her? He would be so blind as to let her back into his life? She left him, alone, to care for me. Went off and did her own thing. And he just accepts her. Just like that ?

"Interesting." was all I could say.

"You look great, Bells, the baby look suites you" she was smiling, proud again.

There was a long moment of silence. The air was almost think with and my chest felt heavy. Resting the opposite hand not in Edward's on my belly I quietly cleared my throat.

"Well...you to look fancy. Did you two have something planned?" Charlie asked. He has never been good with small talk. Something he should never have to make with his daughter.

Edward spoke now. "Yes, we had a very nice dinner in Port Angelas."

Rene looked at Edward now, appearing as if she had came out of a trance. Her face lit up.

"Isn't that nice, hon." she said to Charlie, who tried to seem like it was nice but fail miserably. "Sit down guys. We all have so much to talk about."

She sent an affectionate smile Charlie's way which made me think I was missing something. Figuring out that something wasn't exactly on my to do list at the moment. It was clear that they were together. If that was it, I didn't want to be here.

"Actually," I croaked, "We just stopped by for a second. We should get going." I untangled my hand from Edward's to move it to his arm.

"Wait just a minute, your mother is here and you don't have time to talk with her? If _Edward_-"

Rene interrupted Charlie, " Hold on Charlie, it's alright." she slowly walked to me. She tucked a lock of brown hair behind me ear. "We were just talking and we have something for you to ponder."

I tried not to bat her hand away. "We want you and the baby to move back in. We'd love having you back."

We? She wasn't even here when I was. Furious couldn't even explain my feeling at that moment.

For some God forsaken reason, she continued. "Charlie and I could take care of the baby while you go to collage and after a while work. Anything to help."

There was that proud smile again. Inside, I exploded, said horrible mean things that should never been thought let alone spoken. Charlie fell for this crap? That was quickly answered when he returned to her side with a smile. It was me against my blood. The Cullen's were my family now.

Through gritted teeth I spoke, "No. Thank. You."

There faces fell. Charlie seemed pissed.

"Excuse me?" he said

I pushed out of Edward's grip. "Edward has been accepted to The University of Alaska. I'm moving with him."

"The hell you are!" Charlie screamed. "I'm your father and I am telling you your not going."

"I'm 18 and moved out. I can do what I please. And what I please is finding out what's right for this baby. If it wants to get anywhere in life or do _anything_ for that matter, it needs to get out of this goddamn town!"

No one spoke, everyone just stood there unhappy. I was breathing heavy, and all that action had me dizzy. I began to wobble. Edward was at my side in the same second. Carefully he brought me over to Charlie's dinning table. By the time I sat the world was twisting around me and all I heard were the shuffling of feet.

I put my head in my hands, willing myself not to pass out. I tired to focus on noise rather than the crazy spinning in my head. A cabinet opens and closes, the faucet turns on and there is the faint sound of a glass being filled.

"Bella, listen to my voice. Your alright." Edward voice was right next to my ear.

Everything began to slow. I was soothed. His hands came to my shoulders and lightly made circular motions.

"Here's some water" Rene said.

Not looking at her, I took it and brought it quickly to my lips.

Edward knelt in front of me, his hands on each one of me knees. I felt his eyes watching me closely. After quickly chugging down the contents of me glass, he carefully took it from my hands, and put it into Rene's. I brushed my curly hair away from my hair and glanced around the room. Rene was right behind Edward and Charlie was lent against the sink, looking worried but smug. Bringing my eyes back to Edward I whispered.

"We should leave."

He nodded and stood, looking behind him at my parents.

"Bella needs to rest." he directed this toward Charlie then turned to Rene. "It was nice seeing you again."

He helped me up as I avoided making eye contact with Rene and Charlie. My goal was the door, which was more difficult to achieve considering I had wobbly legs.

"Oh, Bella." Rene's voice was sweet.

Reluctantly, I turned to her.

"Will you keep us posted about the baby? I'd love to help with a baby shower or something."

"Um...yeah. Maybe you can talk to Rene about that." I said, smiling halfheartedly.

Her smile was more genuine and ,as I turned with Edward, I had to ignore the at home feeling it gave me. I wanted to stay mad at her, but the thought of having her back home, like it used to be when I was little, made me feel whole. I would never know why though, I didn't live at home now. Her being there made no difference to me now.

All my internal conflict had me blind. We've been home for about an hour, it's late. Only Emmett and Rose are up with us, watching a movie that a really haven't been watching. I also hadn't notice Edward left the room. He has been unusually distant tonight. I looked around searching for any sign of him. He wasn't anywhere I could see. I glanced next to me on the couch. Rose had Emmett's head in her lap, twirling his hair between her fingers. She looked at me with a smile.

"You alright?" she asks.

"I think so, just a lot to take in in one night. Where did Edward go?" I asked, looking behind me up the stairs again.

She looked at me funny. "He went up stairs ten minutes ago..."

I was a little scared myself. I seriously hadn't noticed he left. The leg underneath me tingled as I made a move to get up from the couch. Things like this, that used to be quite simple, were almost impossible now. Noticing me struggle, Emmett jumped up.

"Got it." he said as he pulled me off the couch. I smiled, rising on my tip toes to kiss him on the cheek.

"Your the sweetest." I said, as I wattled away.

And again, as I went up the stairs, I wished for an elevator. So many sets of stairs in one house. Too many for a pregnant woman. I was almost wheezing by the time I got to the top. Down the hall, I could see Edward's door open with the dim light of his lamp. He stood, looking out the window, with his hands behind his back. I entered slowly, trying not to disturb him. He didn't turn to look at me. Actually , he didn't acknowledge me at all.

Gingerly, I wrapped my arms around his waist, pressing my face into his strong back. He smelt fresh. I felt him sigh underneath my grip. My baby made holding onto him difficult. The moment made me smile. This is when I felt at my best, when I am the most content. My little family was with me.

"Did you mean it, Bella?" he asked twisting around to look me in the eye.

I looked at him, confused. "Mean what?"

"That you wear moving with me, to Alaska."

I had forgot I said anything but it seemed right at the moment.

"I mean, I don't want you moving with me just to prove a point to Charlie. I want you to be happy."

I smiled at him, shaking my head. " It wasn't trying to prove a point. I mean it. The change could be good." I was still trying to convince myself, but it could be what we need. I pressed my face into his chest now.

He stroked my hair, silently. In this moment I felt stronger than ever. Stronger than I felt since...Jacob.

"Edward?" I whispered into his chest.

"Hmm?" he hummed, sweetly.

I took a deep breath. "Will you come with me to Rebecca's baby shower?"

Softly he grabbed my arms to pull me away from him. He looked into my eye, searching. "Are you sure?"

I half smiled, "If I want to get over...Jacob I have to be able to face his family. They may want to be apart of the baby's life. I can't keep that from them."

He was still searching my face when he reached for me cheek. His fingers traced the skin from my ear to my chin.

"Of course I'll go with you." he said pulling my chin closer to him.

He paused with his lips inches from mine to observe me. His eyes connected with mine for a moment and then they were closed and he pressed his soft lips to mine. My stomach fluttered. Would I ever get used to his touch?


	12. Chapter 12 Haunted House

Alice has been moved out for 2 week now. The house has been empty no doubt. She stops by as much as she can but I get that she has a life. It's mainly Edward and I now, and I'm still not sure how that's working out. We've gotten quiet. Something Rose says is normal. And that I shouldn't worry. We just had to adjust.

But Alice has been over a lot this last couple of days. Jasper's went on a business trip for a week. Alice is beside herself, really. So, I invited her to come with us to the baby shower. She is crazy excited, she even went to Port Angles to get a gift. And the day of, I only had about a ounce of courage left. Alice and I are now getting together and thinking about it had me hyperventilating.

"Are you sure you want to do this? We can cancel." she said to me as I sat on the toilet with my face in my hands.

"No, no. It's alright. I can do this. I just need a m-minute." a deep breath, "Don't tell Edward about this, okay? He'd insist that we stay home."

She nodded and waited patiently as I took my moment. I got up from the toilet as fast as a huge pregnant woman can. I planned on using this last ounce I had before I loose it. As if he was called Edward knocked on the bathroom door.

"You girls ready. We better leave soon if we don't want to be late." he said.

Alice looked at me with questioning eyes. I took a look in the mirror. I was dressed simple, elastic wait bland jeans and a longs sleeve sweater. It wasn't much, but I had to admit I liked it. Giving Alice a nod, I headed for the door. When I swung it open, Edward was on the opposite side of the hall leaning against the wall. He smiled at me as I walked out.

He reached for my hand. "You look amazing."

I rolled my eyes at him as I flushed.

"Come on love birds." Alice said bouncing down the stairs.

Much much slower and with less energy, we followed behind her. The fear didn't hit me until we were in the car and it was full force as we turned onto the reservation. I had to force every image I had set in my brain. I had to not count how many times I had been down this road. Keeping my head clear was my goal and not letting Edward see how crazy I was going. Despite all my effort, I began to get dizzy.

Leaning my head against the rest, I closed my eyes. I put my hands on my bump and rubbed it gingerly, trying to remember why I was really doing this. This was for the well being of my fast growing baby. Focusing on that seemed to make it easier. I forced this into every thought. My head slowly began to stop spinning. I opened my eyes slowly. Edward was watching me closely. I could tell he was very worried.

He didn't even watch what he was doing as we pulled into the driveway. Not that anything bad happened. He was good at multitasking. Many cars were parked outside. Mostly ones that didn't belong to people on the reservation. I hadn't been here in almost 5 months. The last time I was with Jacob. My heart started beating faster.

Edward parked, automatically turning to me.

"Are you sure you're ready for this?" he asks.

I looked at the house for a minute and then back at him. "Yes. Let's do this."

Alice opened the door for me and Edward helped me out, something that seemed more and more necessary. He took my hand and squeezed it gently. All three of us walked to the door with courage. All mine was lost when we actually reached the door. I held on to my stomach tight as Edward knocked. In the next second Rachel swung the door open with a squeal.

"No way! Bella, Edward, Alice!"

She hugged them tight lingering on Edward a bit. Then she came to me. Looking at me and then at my stomach. She smiled huge. A gorgeous one I might add. A pang of jealousy ran through me. She really had grown up. To be more than beautiful.

"You look amazing!" she hugged me now.

"You too." I said around her squeeze.

"Who knew my brother had it in him." she said carefully poking my stomach.

I didn't laugh like she did. Neither did Edward, he just looked at me, I could feel his eyes on me. Rachel's smile quickly faded as she realized what she said and things got awkward real quick.

"Um, well, come in." she said gesturing us in.

Edward went in first, pulling me behind him and Alice behind me. The house was already crowded with people. And when everyone turned to look at us, mostly at me, I wanted to run and hide. Quil, Embry, Sam, Paul, Jared, Seth, everyone of my old friends was here. Rebecca sat on the couch in the middle of everybody. Billy on one side of her and then Sue Clearwater on the other. Samuel stood next to Billy observing everyone's reaction. He must not be fully informed about me. Rebecca talks first.

"You guys came, that's wonderful!" and the silence was broken. People still starred but they began to talk again.

"Samuel," Rebecca got her husbands attention, "will you get Bella a seat?"

He followed orders and got me a kitchen chair. I sat and Edward hovered behind me, keeping his hands on my shoulders.

"You dad should be here soon, Bella." Rebecca said over the noise.

She was right, about 5 minutes later, he and Rene came in with a present in their hands. They set it next to ours and stood beside us, not saying a word though. They baby shower came and went and I didn't pay attention much. I just watched everyone. Trying to smile or laugh at the right times. I had to ignore the pictures of Jacob on the wall. And when all the present had been open people started coming to me.

First was Seth, who was crazy excited, talking a thousand miles a minute.

"How far along are you anyway?" he asks after a while, and the whole room goes quiet, all turning to look at me.

I kept my eyes on Seth. "Um, I'll be 5 months the day after tomorrow."

Everyone gasped and came closer.

"Your joking!" Rachel shouted.

"Uh, no." I chuckled.

"Your huge!" she said. "You're bigger than Rebecca!"

I flinched at that, trying not to take offense. My baby was just a fast grower.

Then the questions came a mile a minute. And I could barely keep up. I probably would have passed out if Rebecca didn't step in.

"Back up you guys." she said "Give her some space."

It worked at first but then they just came up one at a time. Quil came next.

"Do you think it's gonna look like Jake?" he asked, almost somber.

I bit my lip lightly. "I don't know." I mumbled.

Sam and Emily appeared now, to which Quil backed away. They both were smiling at me. Emily was the first to speak though.

"You look wonderful Bella." she smiled, "You _really_ are glowing."

"Yes, I'm sure if Jake were here he would be very proud." Sam said, glaring up at Edward.

Emily shot him a look and slapped his chest. She turned back to me while shaking her head.

"Jacob doesn't know what he's done." she said, quiet.

She pushed Sam to the side, waving goodbye. I waved back but felt paralyzed. I held on to my baby as it was my reassurance now. Edward kissed my head and I closed my eyes. I could hear Billy's wheel chair before I heard his voice.

"Bella?" his voice echoing Jake's.

I opened my eyes slowly. "Hey, Billy."

"I was hoping to talk to you. Alone."

I swallowed the lump in my throat as I nodded. I looked back at Edward, trying to keep him from worrying. My face gave it away though, he knew how truly frightened I was. He didn't make a move to stop me though, he just tried to hide his worry with a reassuring smile. I looked at Alice that had a more seriously look. She didn't seem to look worried but she did watch me closely. Is was my turn to turn on the fake charm. It was simple, but she smiled and nodded toward Billy.

I followed behind him. He lead us out the back door. The air was cold for summer, a typical thing for Forks, I was used to it by now. I continued behind him until we reached the old barn where Jake and I used to hang out. In the corner, where we spent many afternoons, was my motor bike. His normally sat right next to mine, but it was missing. Again, my heart stopped and I reached for my bump. Billy spun around toward me.

"You want to pull up something to sit on?" I obeyed and pulled over my cooler that I sat on with Jake.

He waited for me to get comfortable before he started. "I can only imagine what your going through. You and Jacob had something. I've never seen him look at anyone like he did you. It's much like how Edward looks at you. So I don't much understand why he left. But, I want to apologize for him. You didn't deserve this."

I couldn't look at him, I just looked at the at my feet. My tears could not be hidden.

"Something must of happened to make him leave. It couldn't have been you. But nevertheless, he is gone, but I don't believe this child should be ignorant to his other half. It is part of the tribe."

"I know, I know." I said around tears.

"Have you thought that maybe Jacob will come back. He can't stay away forever."

My head snapped up and I looked at him. I have never thought of that. I was spinning again.

"I didn't mean to upset you. I just want you to know, I'm here for you and seeing the baby would be a blessing." he smiled, "You always have this family. It's yours now, as well."

That was surprisingly comforting. Next thing I knew I was clinging to him. He let me squeeze him with a gruff. He kissed the top of my head like a loving father.

"You're always welcome here, Bells." he said.

I took one last whiff of his husky scent before pulling away. Smiling, I wiped away my tears.

"You ready to get back in there?" he asked.

"Actually, I need a minute to compose myself. Will you tell them I'll be in in a sec?"

"Sure, sure." he said, rolling away.

I knew as soon as he delivered my message Edward would be right out after me. So my emotions remained intact...for now. I hated that it was true, but I couldn't block Jacob out, he was going to be with me forever. I just had to learn to deal with not being with him. I had to learn to be _completely _happy without him. I began chewing on my lip as I pondered this.

A pair of arms wrapped around my waist from behind. I knew immediately it was him but he seeming to try and convince me, he placed a soft kiss on my neck. Smiling, I closed my eyes and leaned into him. His hands came to my stomach where rubbed gentle circles.

"Are you alright?" he said, his lips still on my neck.

Slowly I turned to him, bringing my hands to his neck. "I am now."

He smiled before placing a kiss on my cheek. Before he could pull away, I pulled his lips to mine. He pulled me closer and kissed me softly. I pressed against him as much as I could, considering the circumstances. My fingers found their way to his hair and tangled there and soon the kiss became more urgent, needy. Way to soon though, Edward pulled away with a gasp. I also felt myself breathing hard. His smoldering eyes met mine as he rested his forehead against my own.

"I-it's cold. We should probably go back inside." he said through breaths.

I nodded as he placed one last, chased, kiss on my lips. Bringing my hand from his neck, he lead us into the house. People mingled in every corner of the house. Even Alice was talking with Embry and Paul. I smiled at my best friend and the effect she had on the boys, who both we're sent invitations to the wedding. Rachel, Rebecca, and Rene sat admiring her gifts. Which sent me searching for Charlie. He was in the kitchen, Billy talking to him at his side, he wasn't listening though, his eyes were on me.

He half smiled at me mouthing a "hi". I wanted to be mad at him but I couldn't. I turned to Edward.

"I'm gonna go talk to him." I nodded toward my dad.

He smiled. "Okay."

He bent to me for a quick kiss, I gladly gave one to him and as I turned I noticed everyone's eyes. They all looked away quickly. I waddled to Charlie. Billy smiled and rolled away as I approached.

"Hey." I said lamely.

"Hey, Bells."

"Look, I'm sorry about yesterday, I-" he cut me off.

"No, that was my fault. Your just...growing up so fast. It scares me to think I wont be able to see you."

I couldn't help but smile at him. I knew how hard it must be to say that. We both hated talking about our feelings. Softly, I punched his arm. We laughed together and I felt whole.

"So, they day after tomorrow, I get to figure out what the baby is. I thought you might want to stop by and visit."

"Sounds good. Just let me know what time." he said.

Alice bounced to my side. "We're thinking about heading out. Are you ready?"

"Uh, yeah. I'll meet you guys outside."

"Okay." she turned to Charlie "It was nice to see you again, Charlie."

"You too Alice, you too." He said back.

Quickly, I stepped into him. Hugging him tight I said, "I love you Dad."

He put his arms around me tight. "You too Bells, always have, always will."

I held on for a bit longer before letting go. Again, I gave him a soft shove in the arm. It must have been my crazy pregnant-woman-hormones but as I turned my vision blurred with tears. I gave simple goodbyes to everyone I passed. The door, felt to far away. The more steps I took toward it the farther it was away from _me. _Just as soon as the door came close I was stopped by Sam.

He stepped right in front of me. "Bella," he made sure I was looking him in the eyes before he continued, "I _know _Jacob didn't leave because of..." he trailed off, glancing at my stomach.

I swallowed, "Excuse me, Sam."

I went to step around him but he grabbed my wrist. I looked back at him and his eyes burned into mine. If his message hadn't been clear the first time it sure was now. I couldn't look away, his eyes held mine. It felt like it took forever for him to let go and when he did it felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders which ultimately left me feeling cold. I was suddenly aware of the rest of Jake's old group staring at us. After a second, they too, looked away.

Again, I turned for the door, this time reaching my goal. It was dark now and much colder, the only light came from Edward's headlights. The small breeze nipped at my skin. I stepped off the porch, prepared to put this behind me. I had made it out alive, and possibly gained the other half of my family back? I maneuvered my way into the front seat, feeling almost normal. Edward's hand automatically found mind. I rested my head on the seat and looked over at him.

He was perfect, it made my heart ache. Bright green eyes hidden behind thick black lashes that in no way matched his red-brown hair. A perfectly chiseled jaw that matched my favorite crooked smile. Removing my hand from his, I reached for his face. Sliding my fingers, gingerly, down his jaw line to his chin. He leaned into my touch as I repeated the process. I paused again just before his lips before grazing them lightly with my fingertips. He kissed them slightly.

I almost forgot Alice was in the car until her phone rang loudly, causing me to jump and drop my hand.

"Hey Jas!" she answered, happier than ever.

A short pause later.

"Oh, we're just headed home from the shower."

Another pause.

" No, she did really good."

I hated that they talked about me like I was gonna up and blow a gasket one day.

"I don't know. The house is so empty without you. I'm not used to being alone. Completely alone." she said somber.

Pause.

Long pause.

"I know, I miss you. Mhm. Love you. Sleep well." she said, hanging up with a sigh.

"So what's knew?" Edward asks immediately.

"They're close to an arrangement. He should be home in a few days."

"So, are you staying at the house tonight?" he asked looking at me from the corner of his eyes.

"I don't know. What do ya' say, Bella, girls night?" she popped up between us.

I looked at Edward, wanting nothing but him tonight but had no way of saying no so...

"Yeah, sound's good." it wasn't as enthusiastic as I intended.

A girls night, maybe, more like a pamper Bella night. I think they really did believe I was going to blow. I mean, here I was, sitting on the couch, Alice rubbing my shoulders, Rosalie rubbing my feet. I had to admit, it felt nice but my mind didn't seem to want to rest. Edward was in every single one of my thoughts. More than usual. He and Emmett have been sentenced to their rooms. And after I tried to focus on the movie, I really did. Even tired to get into the scared mood to match but nothing seemed to work. Soon it became unbearable.

"I'm gonna call it a night. It's been a...trying day." I had to applaud myself for that one.

"Yeah, you need rest." Alice said as she and Rose got up to help me.

Edward sat on the edge of his bed with his head in his hands. He heard me coming. When I entered the room he jumped to his feet and swiftly walked over to me. Grabbing my face in his hands he pressed his lips to mine. I didn't have time to kiss back before he pulled away to kiss every inches of my face.

Around kisses he said, " You did so good today."

He continued from my jaw line to the nape of my neck. I put my hands on each side of his neck as well, and started kissing him. My lips couldn't move fast enough, I wanted to kiss every inch of him as well. He pulled away to stare deep into my eyes. His gazed burnt my own so much that I felt like I would be sick.

"What's wrong with us?" his voice was almost pleading.

"I need you." I said, pulling him closer.

His lips found mine again and he directed us backward, closer and closer to the bed. My fingers fumbled with his shirt buttons. They shook with nervousness, making it almost impossible to work with. Noticing my obvious struggle, Edward helped quickly, his lips never leaving mine. I slid his shirt down his arms, feeling every toned muscle on the way down. My hands explored his body, the bare warm flesh.

Edward lifted my shirt over my head, pulling away for a short moment to admire what he saw. Now he came to my neck his lips covering me with kisses. He paused just before my jugular and bit there lightly. I groaned, pulling his lips back to mine. I pulled off my sweats and Edward scooped me in his arms as if it was effortless. He set me in the middle of the bed gently and held himself above me. I looked up at him and him down at me.

So much love in those emerald green eyes I thought I would cry. I was in my bra and underwear, completely ready for Edward. I held his face in my hands rubbing gentle circles with my thumbs. We smiled at each other. Much gentler now, he kissed me, tracing the bottom of my lip with his tongue. Again, he returned to my neck, slowly descending to my chest. I reached for the already growing bulge in his pants. His breath caught from my touch.

"Bella..."he whispered, only it wasn't his voice now.

Jacob had said it. I opened my eyes, searching. Edward wasn't there, it was Jake, his tan toned body hovering over mine. I started to panic, trying to blink him away. Each blink alternated from Edward to Jake. Every time Jake appeared my baby was gone.

"Bella...what are you doing? You're mine. Forever. Remember ?" Jake said.

Now all I saw was him. He clouded my vision.

"Go away !" I screamed, putting my hands on each side of my head.

"Bella!" he kept on

"Jake!"

"YOUR MINE!" he screamed back.

"GO AWAY!"

And everything went black but one thing wouldn't go away...Jacob's voice.


	13. Chapter 13 Is she okay ?

**EPOV**

Bella was driving me crazy, she knew exactly how to. I wanted to have the same effect on her. Currently, I was kissing her chest making my way further down.

"Bella..." I moaned under her touch.

Seconds later she froze. When I looked at her she didn't seem like she was in the room with me. She just blinked rapidly, each time growing a fragment more frightened.

"Go away!" she screamed squeezing her eyes shut.

"Bella, are you okay?" I grabbed her face.

"Leave me alone!" she was thrashing now.

"Bella, listen to me. I'm right here. You're okay"

She thrashed against me violently.

"JAKE STOP! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!"

"Alice!" I screamed, continuing to try an calm her down.

Many screams escaped her mouth before Alice came flying into the room, terrified. It took one look an she went for Carlisle. When I turned back to Bella her eyes were open, blinking again.

"Bella, look at me. I'm here."

She did look at me but her body quickly went limp. Carlisle came running into the room then. He surveyed the room.

"What happened?" he asked, breathless.

"I-I don't...know. She just started thrashing." I pulled her into my arms, gently.

"Alright, we better do an ultra sound. We need to know if it effected the baby." he said this while walking over and taking her from my arms, Alice close to his side. He looked at me in the eyes for a moment before exiting the room, leaving me alone.

I put my face in my hands. The image of her painted permanently in my mind, not the image I wanted to see. It wasn't her normal rosy cheeks or big chocolate brown eyes, she looked possessed and I could only feel that it was my fault. I shuddered with the tears that came. I only let myself cry for a small moment, remembering that I had to be strong for Bella, no matter how haunting this night had ended up. After a short moment, I willed my composer and went to Carlisle's home hospital he had made for Bella, only a level up that seemed to take forever to get to.

Bella was on the table, Carlisle already at work. The whole family was here now, Emmett holding onto Rose who had a hand pressed to her heart and Esme was holding Alice's hand. She was close by Bella, starring at the image on the screen. Carlisle moved around getting different angles when he said,

"Oh my."

Alice looked at him worried. "What? What is it?"

He turned our way, eyes slowly shifting between us. "She's having twins."

The whole room went quiet and we all looked at each other, not really knowing if this was good news or not. It stayed like this for quite sometime. Everyone pondered this.

"We'll take a digital still of this and tell her in the morning. For now, we'll take her to your room, Edward. I'd like to talk to you after wards." he eyed me.

I nodded and picked Bella up, gingerly. Alice insisted on staying with Bella while I talked to Carlisle.

I hugged my sister tight after putting Bella in bed. It was a while before I let go, then she grabbed a blanket and sat in my chair, eyes on Bella. Downstairs, Carlisle sat on the couch, waiting for me. I slumped next to him, defeated.

"How are you?" he asked.

I sighed, "I don't know. I feel like this is all my fault."

"Edward, although I did not major in psychology, I am telling you this was in no way your fault. Jacob caused something to change in Bella, maybe even altered her permanently as a person, but she has yet to get over the grieving process. I'm guessing she hasn't been intament since Jacob and something in that triggered the attack. Bella needs time and I'm telling you, it's going to get worse before it get better. When the babies are born, she will be reminded everyday of how they came to be. She has to get used to all this change."

I looked at my father, thankful for what seemed like his ancient wisdom. So much truth in a simple statement. I nodded, accepting that I had a long road ahead of me. I clapped a hand on my shoulder.

"You get some rest. We have a big morning." he rose

"Yeah, I just need a minute." I half smiled.

He nodded and headed to bed himself. I leaned back on the couch, blocking out all that had happened, trying to think of a way to make tomorrow happy. Somewhere between in my thoughts I drifted. Not for long, a nightmare had me jolted awake. I rubbed my face as I got up. The stairs were a challenge. I shuffled into my room, where Alice was passed out right where I left her.

I glanced at the bed and had to do a double take when I noticed its lack of Bella's presence. I did a quick circle of the room, not seeing her anywhere. I didn't wake Alice, I just went on a searching spree. Downstairs, the kitchen, the first floor, bathrooms, all the while whispering her name. When I came up short I headed for Carlisle's room ready to wake him. The third floor had a deck that completely around the house. As I flew up the stairs I noticed the temperature change and slowed. I could see the glass door wide open that lead to the deck. Looking out the windows, I could faintly make out the image of Bella. Slowly, I made my way down the hall to the open door. Goosebumps rose as I stepped outside, not only from the cold. As I got closer my eyes adjusted more. She was in her bra and underwear the same way I had left her. She didn't move a muscle. It was almost like she was frozen, or put on pause. From inches away, purple and blue mixed into her pale skin.

"Bella?" I whispered softly.

Her face was blank, vacant, eyes starring blankly out at the forest; like she could see everything. Careful not to startle her, I touch her arm gently. It was ice under my fingertips. She blinked now, very, very slowly looking my way. Her eyes roamed over every inch of my face as hers became a bit softer now. Peeling her fingers away from the deck railing she went to touch my face. Again, skin like ice traced my jaw line and I began to wonder how long she had been out here.

"Bella, you need to come inside." I felt like I was talking to a confused child.

She merely blink at me some more before her face went somber. She closed her eyes tight, tears pinching out of them. Her purple hand came to her mouth, trying to stop the sob that escaped. The other hand landed on her perfectly rounded stomach. I put my hand on hers, attempting to warm it up. The baby seemed to be shifting inside her. When I looked up at her her eyes were open, starring. And with a smile she collapsed into my arms.

Bella trembled all night, under my body heat. I soon became cold as well. Once she finally stilled I couldn't sleep. Didn't even try really. Watching her was my number one priority. Day light came as the whole house started to wake. Soon after the hungering smell of bacon wafted up the stairs. Alice shuffled in, after taking her to her own room last night, to check on us. Bella fast asleep, me in the chair close to the bed.

"Mom made breakfast." she said, crossing her arms, a firm eye on Bella.

To my silence she continued. "I'm sorry I didn't watch her good enough last night. I..."

I stood as she trailed off pulling her pixie body into my arms. She sobbed into my chest.

"It's not your fault. We're all tired. Nobody expects us to keep an eye on her 24/7."

We stood here for God knows how long. Alice and I have always been close but with all the recent events it feels like I haven't seen her in months. We cried together, wiping away each others tears.

"Let's go eat." I said. Alice glanced worryingly at Bella. "She'll be fine. She's passed out."

We went down stairs to join our silent family. Nobody cared to carry out our morning routine. We were all to haunted by the events of last night. We ate in silence, only the sound of chewing. Alice and I didn't eat much and I realized that if anyone was effected by this it was her. Her best friend was struggling, more than anyone I've ever seen struggle with something. Alice and I were in sync. Her pain was my pain, her fears also my fears. I watched as she nibbled a piece of bacon, realizing that I was mimicking her actions. In sync.

We all relocated to the living room turning the TV on low, to listen to any movement. A couple times we heard the toilet flush but never followed by foot steps. Rosalie talked Emmett into getting out of the house and Carlisle and Esme eventually followed, deciding a movie would be best. It was us again, all alone. We sat close on the couch trying to watch the show. Not long after, Alice drifted, not really knowing when, I left her be.

I didn't know I had drifted until I heard Alice's phone ring and it took a couple rings for me to realize what it was. My eyes popped open quickly.

"Hello, love." she croaked into the phone.

With no sudden movements she got up from the couch.

"I see.", a lighter mood now, "Yeah, I'll start on my way. Love you too, bye." She hung up and began to stretch.

She turned to me, almost guilty looking. "Um, Jasper decided to come home early. He'll be in in a couple of hours."

I smiled at her hidden excitement. "Go."

"Are you sure?"

"Go."

She tip toed over, planting a kiss on my cheek then ran to the table retrieving her keys, purse, and then ran out the door. I smiled to myself, thankful that Alice would have her support system back. My head found its way back the back of the couch, eyes heavy. It was dark outside already and Bella still hadn't gotten up. All this worry, how I wished I could erase it all for Bella. These were my thoughts as I drifted.

I awoke with a jump start, blinking the dream from my eyes. It took a minute for my eyes to adjust as I looked around me. At first I didn't know where I was. The house was completely silent and I noticed my mother's purse sitting on the small table by the front door. I hadn't heard my parents come home, I must have been out. Stiffly, I rose from the couch, rubbing my eyes.

I don't know what compelled me to do it but, I walked to one of the many huge windows on the opposite wall of the couch. I starred out at the quiet seemingly peaceful forest. A slight breezed breathed through the green trees. This peaceful, private feel was my favorite part of living away from town. For a minute I wondered where Alice was and how late it was. I observed for a moment longer before climbing my way up the stairs to my bedroom.

Bella was smothered in blankets. The plate of food that Esme brought up for her, sat on the bedside table devoured. Not one piece left. I smiled at her peaceful expression. Sleep was her only escape that was of course if her dreams weren't mimicking her reality. Quietly, I stripped out of my cloths into my boxers and slipped in next to her. As I rapped my arms around her waist, the best I could of course, I felt her sigh underneath me. She rolled over so she was facing me, a faint smile on her lips.

"I love you." she whispered, still asleep.

I closed my eyes with a smile.


	14. Chapter 14 Time to tell Bella

**APOV**

The drive to pick up Jasper from the air port never seemed so long. I was getting antsy, tapping my fingers on the steering wheel as I waited in the pick up line. When Jasper's face bobbed around in the small crowd I immediately jumped out of the car running to him. He dropped his bags as soon as he saw me inviting me into his arms. I slammed into his body with more force than attended but he didn't budge. I buried my face into the crook of his neck, taking in his scent that I had gone to long without smelling.

"God, I've missed you." he said with his lips at my ear.

I pulled away mashing my lips to his. Their sweetness made me salivate. People pushed passed us and we ignored everyone of them. His mere presence put me at ease, Bella wasn't home in pain, the whole family was as it should be. He pulled away slightly, resting his forehead on mine.

"2 more months and you'll be all mine."

2 months could go by fast enough. He grabbed my hand and pulled me to the car. He insisted one driving despite his long plane ride. Refusing to let go of my hand he began to talk about everything. His trip, the people, the things they discussed, his new roles taking over as the company manager. I leaned my head against the rest and listened, completely soothed by his southern twang I had so dearly missed. He asked about the wedding progress and I, regrettably, didn't have much to share. With all the new stuff going on with Bella, I had barely thought about the wedding. I still had yet to order my dress and momentarily worried about it. I would have to start working hard now.

Would Bella be ready ?

**BPOV**

I've been awake for about an hour now debating on if I was ready to face everyone. The last thing I remember clearly was Edward and I. I clutch my baby bump close. I can hear Edward's family all down stairs, watching something I can't make out. Edward would be up to check on me soon. Would I pretend to be asleep this time? Countless times these last couple of days I had done so, not ready to face him. I made something that was supposed to be special into a terror. The least I could do is talk to him. But I wasn't even capable of that...

Just as I predicted, I hear Edward's footsteps start edging closer. I have memorized how each person in this houses foot steps sound. Edward's were always the most cautious. I counted how many too. 10 steps from the top of the stairs to the doorway of the room. When I get to nine I realize I haven't closed my eyes and then it's to late. He is standing there staring at me in shock. His shock morphs into a smile as he walks to the bed.

"You're awake."

I've been awake a lot, I want to say but suppress the urge. "Mhm." is all that comes out.

He sits on the bed next to me brushing a very oily piece of hair from my face. I hadn't taken a shower in what seemed like a long time and I suddenly felt sorry for Edward, who sleeps with me every night. It didn't seem to bug him as he kisses my cheek.

"I missed you." he said very lightly. I immediately felt guilty for not coming around sooner. I was so worried he wouldn't want to talk to me but I think deep down I knew he wouldn't. I just needed to be alone, something that is nearly impossible in this house. For the slightest moment, I considered movie back with my father like him and Rene suggested. The thought was immediately drove from my head as I could only find unlikely pros with inevitable cons. There, I would only slip into a worse depression. At least here I had to pretend to be happy and am never left alone to not have to pretend.

"Come back to me," he gently whispered rubbing circles with his thumbs on my cheeks. I blink through my thoughts to again see his beautiful sleep ridden face. Bringing a hand to his face, my thumb traced the outline of his bottom lip. I smiled, pulling him close to me. He held me with one arm and my bump in the other. He buried his face in my neck like a young child would. I kissed neck while stroking his head. And then he was crying. It was the first time I'd seen it. Would you say I was sick and twisted for liking it? For once, I was taking care of him, not the other way around. I didn't have to think about me, I could think about him.

I stroked his neck and as he shuddered with tears. "I'm so sorry." he said through sobs. Gingerly, I grabbed his head between my hands and forced him to let me see his face. The purple circles under his eyes were soaked with his tears. I wiped them away with my thumbs and after placed a soft kiss on each one. I let go of his face, dropping my hands in his lap.

"_I'm_ sorry." I said. We held each other then. For hours. We didn't speak, just touched one an other. It wasn't till dark that he finally broke our silence.

"You haven't asked about the baby..."he whispered.

I actually hadn't thought about it since, I vaguely remember Carlisle caring me into the hospital room. It hadn't crossed my mind, until now, that he probably had to do an ultra sound. I look at Edward stunned.

"Did we find out the sex?" I ask and his pause makes my heart sink, "What?" almost angry now.

"You see, it's more difficult than expected to find that out." he says.

"Why's that?" I ask almost panicked.

He looks at me with an odd expression I couldn't quite understand.

"Are you up for talking with Carlisle?"

I sit on the hospital bed in our little at home set up and Edward is standing next to me, watching me like a hawk and Alice is on the other side, doing the same. Carlisle only allowed these to in here with us. He now stands in front of me, a picture in his hand that I have yet to see. He's smiling, which is a little reassuring. Stepping closer he hands me the picture. I examine the photo for a moment but it doesn't really seem to make sense to me. I see two heads, and 4 feet. Is the printer on the fritz?

I look at Carlisle confused. "There's to babies in this picture, Bella."

My mouth literally drops as I start to panic. I couldn't tell if I was really excited or terrified. Again, I look at the photo touching it lightly. My **two** babies are curled up into each other and almost look like they're hugging. My heart aches and I know that I've fallen in love. The new difficulty of another baby doesn't even phase me. I look at Edward, who still looks worried, and smile, tears already forming. He smiles to as he grabs my hand. I turn to Alice, who's beaming like a proud mother. Everybody seemed to be very surprised that I was excited about yet another addition. So much that Esme and Alice insisted on a big dinner to tell my father. I found that if I stuck by Edward, smiling became a lot easier.

I went along with this a little reluctantly. Especially because Esme insisted on me calling my father for the invite. As I thought would happen, Rene answered. An awkward phone call and confirmation later Alice and I were getting dressed to go to the grocery store. After a very long shower on my part of course. It wasn't originally meant to be long but my matted bed hair and fuzzy legs made this impossible. I actually had to get dressed to go into town, something I hadn't done in a long time. I pulled on one of Edward's sweatshirts and some pants I had bought with Alice. Yay for elastic waist bands.

This was my first trip into town since I had gotten pregnant. I knew I was bound to see someone at our convenient little town grocery store. Since graduation, I hadn't seen any of my classmates. Had they heard of my pregnancy? People like to talk. Did they know about my heartbreak or did they think I was a slut? God knows how many rumors had been started about me. Who would have thought of me, Bella Swan, quiet, keep to herself kind of girl, would be the center of anyone's rumors. My premonitions were not wrong. Alice and I had just turned into the produce section when I heard several people call my name. I turned slowly. Standing by the fruit was Jessica, Mike, and Lauren. I smile weakly, sticking my already clammy hands in the pocket of Edward's sweatshirt.

They all rushed to me. Jessica speaking first. "Bella!" she gives me an awkward hug, trying to find away around my already big stomach. Mike does the same just a little more genuine. Lauren doesn't even bother, she just stands off to the side, not looking at me. And then we're standing there silent, the air thick. Jessica clears her throat.

"So it's true?" she gestures toward my stomach almost satisfied looking. I imagine how excited she is to be the one to confirm whatever is going around.

"People have heard?" I sound a little sullen. "What's going around?"

Mike gives Jessica a frustrated look as she begins to talk. "Oh you know, the whole 'She's just 18. She must be sleeping around' thing."

"Or there's always the 'She was with Jacob but got pregnant with her best friend's brother and cause Jake to move away' thing." Lauren steps in.

I had to try not to flinch at that but Lauren could see my discomfort and, I'm sure, felt triumphant. Mike looked very uncomfortable in the middle of all this and clearly tries to move on to a brighter subject.

"So...do you know what you're having?" he asks.

I look at Alice who's is still starring down Lauren and Jessica and then turn back to my "friends".

"Um, no. It's kind of harder to find out the sex with twins."

"Twins?" they all say in unison. I nod with a fake smile.

Again, I try and change the subject. "How is Angela? Ben?"

"They're back together. And going away to collage together soon. Brainiacs. But um, what should I say to put all the rumors to rest?" Jessica says.

Just as I go to open my mouth Alice answers for me, "Not as if it is anyone's business but Jacob in fact is the one who left Bella when he found out and Edward has decided to help her out with this. Unlike some people in this town, our family cares about Bella. Friends would usually call and check in. Unfortunately, we are on a tight schedule and we must be going. I'm sure she'd love catching up. Like a said, friends can call anytime." she grabs my arm as all of their mouths drop open. Lauren closes hers quickly when I smile brilliantly as Alice pulls me away. The last thing I see from them is two glaring girls and a guilty waving Mike.

This was sure to start more rumors but I couldn't help but love my best friend. Home never felt so nice. We walked in the door with groceries in hand. I help put them away a bit antsy since I didn't see Edward when I walked in. I try to be patient and help Alice and Esme but I find myself rushing around the kitchen. When they tell me we're finally done I try not to appear excited to leave the room as I waddle my way out and up the stairs which seemed to become steeper everyday. As quietly as possible I tip toed down the hall and peaked into the room. Edward sat on his bed very concentrated on a "Becoming a Father" book. I smile ear to ear as I step in. He looks up as I near and smiles. He pats the spot next to him and I shuffle over.

As I sit down he asks, "How'd it go?"

I roll my eyes at the thought. "We ran into Jessica, Mike, and Lauren."

He looks up from the book again, eyes widening. He didn't speak for a moment. "How are they doing?"

I shrug before answering, "Lauren was Lauren," he gave me a knowing look, "Mike and Jessica seemed fine. Surprised for sure." I said glancing at my stomach.

He nodded and again, became silent. For a moment we starred at each other. He put his book down to swing his legs over the edge of the bed to sit beside me. Tucking a piece of hair behind my ear, he smiles at me. I smiled back, grabbing his hand and holding it to my cheek. Little moments like these I had to cherish. Alone time wasn't possible in this house. And after the babies are born? What then? Would we ever be able to make love? An even bigger picture question enters my mind. Even if we did get alone time would I be able to get over my thoughts of Jacob or would I just go crazy again? At this thought, I let Edward's hand fall from my face. I can't look at him.

He doesn't say anything although he knows something isn't right. He just simply puts his hand back in mine and lets them rest on my stomach. It feels like hours pass before I can finally bring myself to look Edward in the eye. When I do he looks back, a faint smile on his lips. He gently lifts my chin and brings his face closer. His lips graze mine lightly then again much rougher. I kiss back with the same intensity as his hand moves to the base of my neck. It must have been my crazy pregnant lady hormones but I pounced. I push him back against the bed and crawl over him. My lips find his immediately but don't stay there long. Before I know it my lips are all over his face kissing every inch of it.

Purposely I made myself think of Jacob. I wanted to see if I was capable. This time his face doesn't completely evade my vision only a pang of pain deep in my chest. This encourages me to continue forward. I'm bumbling with the buttons on Edward shirt when his shaky hands stop me. I look at him frustrated.

"Stop." I don't. I only continue to kiss his chest.

"Bella, stop." he says pulling my head away from his body. "We can't...you can't." He wiggles out from under me and makes as much distance as possible. "You're father will be here in 2 hours." he stumbles backward out the door.

I stare after him for a long time before slamming my fists onto the bed. Pressing a pillow to my face, I scream. When I'm done, I throw it across the room. He may have thought he got away and he did for now but we have plenty of time tonight. Charlie and Rene wont be here after 8. I push my hair out of my face and tangle my fingers in it. I give up on the thought for now and scoot off the bed, deciding it was time to get ready for tonight. I walk to my side of the carpet stripping off my pants. I rummaged through it for a second placing my final decision on a sun dress Esme bought me a while ago as a surprise.

I pull off my shirt and close the bedroom door. I head over to the vanity mirror to examine my ever changing body. I have been lucky enough to not gain stretch marks. My thighs and butt have improved along with an extra cups size in my breast. My hands come to my bump and I turn sideways to get a better angle. I close my eyes, trying to remember what it was like _not_ to be pregnant. It was only 5 months ago but the memory was already fuzzy. That life felt like a dream. Shaking my head like it would actually shake the pain away, I slid the dress over my head. I pull my hair out of the fabric and examine it. I hadn't realize how long it has gotten. It hangs to the top of my butt. I tie it into a braid and bring it over my left shoulder.

I apply a little mascara and hate how it makes my eyes burn. Make up has never been my thing, but Esme said it was to be a formalish dinner. I put some red flip flops on the match the dress. Again, I examine myself in the mirror and am almost proud of myself. Zero help from Alice as well. I feel pretty too, like for once, out of this whole pregnancy, I actually am glowing. With a little application of red lipstick, I am ready to face this night.


	15. Chapter 15 Dinner

The Cullen's compared to the Swans? Just not fair. Everyone seemed to dress around me. All the Cullen's have some kind of red in there clothing. Everyone except Charlie and Rene of course. Who are both dressed nicely. Esme welcomes them in with a smile and we all stand in a line to meet them. Alice and Jasper are together, of course, and Rosalie and Emmett, and Esme joins Carlisle as she walks back in. They come to me first, give me a hug and tell me how great I look and then continue down the line. When everyone's finished Alice clears her throat.

"Dinner will be finished soon. If the girls would like to join me in the kitchen, boys you find something to do," she looks long and hard at Emmett when she finishes, "quietly."

Everyone does as she orders. In the kitchen Esme and Rene group up and start putting the last touches on dinner. Alice and I start to set the table. She smiles the whole time.

"What?" I finally ask.

"Either you're getting better or being pregnant gave you a special skill. You got ready all by yourself. Look good too." she smiles wider.

I smile back as I set a plate down. When were done we sit and talk.

"The wedding's only two months away." she says looking at the ring on her finger.

"Would you like help with planning?" I ask.

She looks at me now. "I don't know Bella. I don't want to stress you out."

"It wouldn't stress me out. It might actually give me something to do. I feel like I've been taking away from everybody, I don't like it."

She smiles again. "Okay. But, Bella, you will never take anything away from us. We enjoy helping you. My brother is in love with you ya' know."

Most anytime I'd be glad to hear that, but now, when I was still hurting, it just confuses me. Before the thought can go anywhere else Esme is placing food on the table.

"Would you girls tell the boys it's time to eat?" Esme asks.

Alice makes a move to do it but I stop her, "I'll get them." she smiles

I walked out of the kitchen to the living room. Charlie is sitting on the edge of the recliner, fists clench. I notice that all of the boys are exactly like him in different places in the room. The scene makes me smile. Something happens on the TV and all of them jump up with a scream. I now realize they are watching a ball game. Then I notice that Edward hasn't jump up like the rest of the boys, who are still shouting. He is looking at me smiling. I give a small one back and jump when Rosalie comes behind me, a hand on my back.

"Oh goodness! I'm sorry." she says and then begins to register the room.

"Oh no it's fine." I say.

"Having some trouble?" she asks. I nod a bit.

"I've got it." she says as she steps further into the room. Of course, no one notices, they're all still shouting at the TV, everyone except Edward. Turns back to me and winks and then back to the loud scene.

"HEY!" she screams. Immediately, everyone turns to stare at her, silence overtaking the room. "Dinner is ready. Would everyone please join us in the kitchen?" To this, they all groan. Emmett even a has the balls to speak.

"Babe, the games getting pretty serious." he says and he immediately knows what he's done wrong. A simple look from Rose sends them all rushing into the kitchen. I step out of the way as they all pass me, Edward hanging behind. Rose walks passed me with a smile. She makes a gesture as if she is brushing off her hands.

"And that's how it's done." she say simply, walking away.

I'm smiling when Edward gets to me. He puts his arms around my waist with some difficulty. I put mine around his neck and look up at him.

"I don't know if I have gotten the chance to tell you how beautiful you look tonight, Ms. Swan." he says. I smile up at him and make a move to give him a kiss. He puts a finger to my lips, smiling my favorite crooked smile.

"You wouldn't want any evidence." he said pulling his finger away to let me examine it. It is red where it touched my lips. I had almost forgot about my lipstick. I don't where it that often. He lets go of me and takes my hand, squeezing it tightly. It is this way that he guides me into the kitchen.

When we walk in everyone is seated and I feel as if I am on display. My father keeps a firm eye on me while I find my seat near the end of the table next to him. Edward sits to my left. Charlie, as if you didn't already guess, is at the end of the table opposite of Carlisle. Something I feel Esme and him arranged to make Charlie feel better, more at home. I warned them about his uncomfortableness with these kind of things. No one speaks at first. Whether it's do to eating or it being awkward, I don't know but it stays this way until desert. Esme prepared an awesome berry cobbler, which I told her was my father and I's favorite, with ice cream. We're halfway into it when Esme speaks.

"Bella has some news for you, Charlie and Rene." she looks at me with an encouraging smile and soon all eyes are on me. I swallow hard as Edward's hand finds mine underneath the table. I look at him and he gives the same smile as Esme, making them look very much alike. I look back to my parents, notice how weird it still feels to say "parents".

"I'm having twins." the words come out in a rush.

My father drops his fork and begins choking on his pie. Rene jumps up, completely ignoring Charlie, and starts crying. She runs over and gives me a almost painful hug.

"Oh my goodness Bella! This is wonderful! I get two grand kids? How did this happen? Twins don't run in either one of our families." she looks at Charlie who it beginning to calm down.

I look down at the table preparing my self to answer, again, I swallow hard. "Jacob has twins in his family." I say and I can't help thinking that if she had been here for my childhood, she might know this.

"Oh. Well, at least something good came out of him." she says. Everyone's mouths drop from her comment. I can't help but glare. At least it keeps me from crying. Everyone's still starring at her when she looks quickly up from her plate at Esme.

"What about a baby shower?" she's excited. Esme smiles.

"Wonderful idea, Rene. Help me clear the table and we'll discuss it." she says and they both rise. We all watch them for a bit but soon the boys all head to the living room. Edward doesn't make a move. He still has a hold of my hand. I look at him closely. His red tie is off a bit. I start to fix it.

"You can go." I say.

He smiles stretching his neck out for me. "I'd much rather be in here with you."

I smile to, patting his chest when I'm done. "Thank you." he says.

Nodding, I lean over the arm of my chair for a kiss. He does the same. Our lips barely touch before he pulls away. I slump back in my chair, disappointed. It's about this time when Alice and Rosalie's chairs screech across the floor. I look up at them as they grab their plates. I force my chair back trying to do the same but I forget how impossible this is for me. I just find myself gripping the table for support. Edward stands immediately to help. He grips my arms as I finally make it to my feet. When I'm steadied I pull my arms out of his hands. He looks at me surprised.

"Go watch the game." I say grabbing my plate.

I feel his eyes starring after me as I approach Alice. I see her shrug at him slightly. Anger floods through me and I don't quite understand it myself. It's not long before that anger turns to guilt. When the kitchen is all clean Rene and Esme return to the table to continue planning. Alice, Rose, and I gather around the kitchen sink. Alice pulls herself up on the counter and for a second I miss doing this.

"So, what's up with you?" Rose asks.

"I don't know. I'm just tired of being pregnant." I say, shrugging.

They both nod. We all go silent for a moment. Of course it really wasn't silent, the sound of the whole houses excitement is to be heard. I can hear Emmett and Charlie's screams the most.

"So...how's the wedding planning going?" I ask Alice and before I know it, all three of us are knee deep in wedding magazines. The rest of the night is spent ordering things needed and planning pictures for the invitations.

"Bella, you're really into photography, why don't you do our pictures?" she says and I am surprised.

"You don't have to do them for the wedding! I want you to enjoy that but Carlisle has this Cannon that he never uses, it's not the best but I figure you could manage? Don't do it if you feel it would be to much stress."

I am beyond flattered. "I'd love to! Anything I can do to help." She smiles and claps her hands in excitement.

Charlie appears then. I turn to see him and figure the game is over. It's already almost 9?

"Rene, are you ready to leave?" he asks, yawning.

She looks up at him. "Oh, we we're just starting on a theme." She looks quite disappointed.

I think of my little old truck and smile. "Dad, I could give...Mom a ride home when she's done."

Everyone looks at me in surprise. Charlie doesn't seem to like the idea but Rene jumps right on it.

"Oh would you? That would be wonderful. Unless, of course," she turns to Esme, "you would like to call it a night."

Esme smiles, "I'm good for another hour."

Charlie huffs. "Alright." and then walks over to her. He plants a soft kiss on her lips and I can't help but look away. It was still odd to me. When he pulls away he looks towards me.

"Bells, could you walk me to the door?" he asks.

I looked at him for a second and then nodded. Our walk to the door is silent but he asks me to join him on the steps for a moment. The air is chilly, something that would normally bother me, but I hadn't realized how hot I was.

"We didn't have much time to talk tonight." he says.

I nod, "Yeah."

"Bells...you look great. Really." he clears his throat awkwardly, "The whole pregnancy look suits you."

I smile at my father. We both were never much to talk about our feelings. We actually weren't once to really _talk_. But it wasn't ever awkward, we both were content with the silence.

"So...twins." he says, rocking on his heals.

"Guess so." I say.

A long pause. "Look, Bells, I miss ya being around the house. If with your mother back, it just isn't the same. I want you to come home. We can help you with the baby...I mean..uh _babies_."

"Dad, I already told you...I'm moving with Edward where ever he decides to go. I can go to collage, get a job."

"You can do all that here. Who would watch over the babies while you do all these things. Rene and I could be your free daycare." he says.

"Edward has family down in Alaska. In Alaska we'd have the whole set up, even a house ready. They could watch them. And besides, I don't want to put that burden on you guys. Especially with mom back. You guys need time to get reacquainted, err whatever."

He sighs deeply and rubs his face. "You're just growing up so fast. I feel like just yesterday you were my little girl dependent on me and then I blinked and you're already starting a family...a life of your own."

My dad rarely sees me cry. So I don't know if it was my crazy pregnant hormones or what but I stared getting choked up. I stepped into him and wrapped my arm around his waist. His arms circled around me.

"I'll always be your little girl, Dad." I say and he kisses my forehead.

"Hope so." he says and then we stand like this for a long long time. When he pulls away he clears his throat. "Better get going."

As he walks down the steps a say, "I love you, Dad." and as he gets to the bottom he turns back to me.

"Me too Bells." and as he turns I hear him say, "Always have, always will." like he used to.

As I stepped back inside, the overwhelming feeling of content flooded through me. It was the most at peace I had felt in a long time. Edward noticed this too. I was smiling like an idiot as he walked over to greet me.

"I love it when you smile." he says as he puts both hands on either sides of my waist. This, of course, makes me smile bigger as he pulls me to him. "Please, don't ever stop." he says.

I wrapped my arms around his neck. "I know a way to make that happen." I whisper into his ear. He chuckles but stops abruptly when I draw his earlobe into my mouth. His breath caught and for once I felt like I was in control. So, just for the fun of it, I pull away with a loud laugh. Emmett and Carlisle look at us curiously. I let go of Edward completely and start to walk away but just before I could I slide one finger down his chest to the button of his jeans at which he flinches. Then it's back to the kitchen for me.

About an hour later, Rene and Esme announce that they are finishing up. I grab my jacket and tell her I will meet her outside. I retrieve my keys from the door side table that have remained almost untouched since I moved in. I was thankful for my extra time because I had a difficult time getting in my truck. It took quite some effort and by the time I was in the cool cab I found myself out of breath. It felt foreign to stick the key in the ignition and rev my truck to life but soon it all came back to me and I felt oddly at home. I forgot how much a part of my old life my truck was.

And then that was it, the good feeling was gone only to be replaced with pain that seem like a knife stabbing into my stomach and being twisted. I could almost smell Jacob in it. His husky earthy smell imbedded in my seats. And then I was being suffocated. No fresh air would come. I rolled down the window in a panic. As the cool air rushed in and filled my lungs, I heard the front door shut. I closed my eyes and willed my breathing back to normal. I just opened my eyes as Rene slid into the seat next to me.

"Are you okay?" she asks.

"I'm fine." I say as a start to pull out of the spot my truck has been parked. It runs just fine as we drive down the winding road into town. We remain mostly silent until we reach town.

"I am just so proud of you, Isabella." Rene says randomly.

I glance at her out of the corner of my eye. "Uh...thanks."

"You've just done so good. And you're so strong. Take after your mother." she says and I bite the inside of my cheek trying not to say something harsh.

"And now I get two grand kids? _Two?_ I always wanted more than one child but you know how stubborn your father is. Always has to have his way." she says.

"Is that why you left him?" I blurt out, automatically regretting it.

She thinks for a long moment. We're turning onto our street before she starts to answer.

"I left your father because I could find more in life. We married young and I kind of went through a panic when I thought I was going to be with one person for the rest of my life. I was young and I was wrong. I was wrong for leaving you and your father and I don't expect you to trust me or to forgive me easily. That's why I wanted to help out with all of this." We park in front of the house as she pauses. "And let me be a lesson to you. I regret leaving you guys more than anything in my life. Don't ever leave Edward because a shred of doubt. He's right for you...I know it."

She just finishes when Charlie walks out of the front door. She follows my line of sight and sighs and then turns back to me. After a moment she pulls me into a hug.

"I really do love you." she says as she steps out of the cab. I wave to the both of them as they slip into the house. I sit there for a moment going over what she said in my head. I wished I didn't believe her but I did. And I was, sometime, going to forgive her, but like she said, she would have to work for it. Then I decided to push everything out of my mind and think of the one person that mattered right now. His pale skin, perfect emerald green eyes, crooked smile, and just wonderful all around. I throw the truck into drive and sped away. The whole ride home I thought of Edward and what tonight would end like.

Hopefully intertwined in each other.


	16. Chapter 16 Love

I walked into the house, dropping my keys on the table, and headed straight upstairs. Everyone seemed to have retired to their rooms. I walked down the hall as quiet as possible. Oddly enough, our door was shut, something that never happened, so I kind of gave up on the sneaking in part. I opened the door a crack and was surprised to see Edward sleeping. I knew he was pretending as I crept in because the coarse of his breath changed. I paused before the bed with a huff, hands on my hips. His eyes flickered open.

"Tired?" I ask sarcastically.

He doesn't say anything, just stares up at me. "Fine." I say, bringing the dress up over my head. It fell to the ground and his eyes widened. I smiled, returning my hands to their original position.

"S-should I go sleep on the...couch?" he asks and my smile fades quickly. I let my arms fall and glare at him. He sits up and sighs.

"Bella, I don't know what you expect me to do? You know what happened last time. You're not ready.' he says to me and I get angry. Like seriously frustrated.

"Who said you get to decide when I am ready? I am in charge of myself and I am getting tired of all of you thinking you know what's best for me." I am screaming now. "I am not a child, I can think and do for myself damn it!"

"Bella-" he starts

"No! Just stop. I can handle myself, okay? All of you guys look at me like I am a ticking time bomb. Everyone does. Even if I am you don't have to treat me like one. I'd like to at least pretend to be normal." I say.

He just stares at me as I stand there out of breath. This to irritates me. "Say something!" I scream.

He to gets angry and jumps quickly out of bed. "What do you want me to say? That I am sorry? Because I'm not. It isn't like we do this all on purpose Bella. Everyone here loves you so much and seeing you in pain causes us pain. We don't want to say something wrong and send you back into depression. As much as you hate to admit it you are horrible at hiding emotions. You're strong Bella, but not that strong!" he was yelling back.

I glare at him for a moment before going to the bed, grabbing a blanket and pillow and going to the dresser. I pull out a tank top and sleeping shorts. I didn't even glance his way as I walked out of the room. As I walked down the hall I heard Emmett crack the door. I turn to look at him and he clasps a hand over his eyes.

"Oh shit, Bella, I'm sorry." he clears his throat, his hand still over his eyes, and whispers, "Everything okay?"

"Everything's fine." I grumble back.

"You sure?" he asks.

"I said everything is fine!" I snap back at him.

"Okay...sorry." he said shutting the door behind him.

Downstairs, I dress and grab a small blanket from the basket on the side of the couch. I make a bed and attempt to lay down. I manage after some difficulty. Closing my eyes, I try to get comfortable. I can't though. All I can do is think of the fight, and how the night went so wrong. Soon, I'm feeling guilty. Everything Edward said was true. How could I have expected anything different? I tried to put myself in there position and I couldn't come up with any other way to do it. I debated on going back up there to crawl into bed with him but decided against it. He probably needed time.

We were rarely apart these days...and I expected him to make love to me after what happened? Why? I wouldn't want to go through that again. I was selfish for even considering to chance that again. Crazy pregnant lady hormones. I missed all of the things I already couldn't do now. Four more months of this? I didn't even want to think about how big I was going to be. Soon I wouldn't even have the option of sex. Again, I found myself aroused and I hated it. I even seriously considered masturbation. I had never been much for it but even that sounded better than nothing now.

Just as I decided I would do it this one time, I heard foot steps on the stairs. I froze, expecting it to be anyone but Edward. I was wrong though. He walked around the edge of the couch to look at me. I sit up and give him a soft smile. He smiles too and comes to sit on the coffee table. He helps me sit up completely.

"I'm sorry." I say, putting my hands on both of his knees.

"No, I'm sorry, you're right. We should try and help you feel normal." he says, brushing my braid back over my shoulder. We don't say anything for a bit but he continues.

"You're right about everything. You can think for yourself. I know that, but I just don't want you to think you have to be alone in this. And if you think you're ready to have-" I put a finger to his lips and he stops talking. I smile big at him and pull his face to mine.

"I want you." I say to him and then he is kissing me, all over. He pushes himself off the table and me to the back of the couch, his arms on either side of my head on the head rest. Then one of them reaches behind me to the small of my back and he pulls me to him. I wrap a leg around his bare waist, happy I shaved. He brings his mouth to my earlobe and draws it in. I let out a small moan, remembering we are in the empty living room. I bring my hands to his back and,as he sucks harder on my ear, dig my nails into his skin. His mouth lets go of my skin and he moans into my ear.

Then we're standing, me wrapped around his waist. I don't know how, but he takes us to our room without his lips leaving mine. He lays me on the bed gently then pulls my tank top over my head. This time he doesn't hesitate to unhook my bra, it's off before my pants. He kisses each breast softly before moving on to my shorts. He pulls both them and my panties off in one swift moment. I am completely exposed and loving the way his eyes roam over my skin. Goose bumps automatically arise.

He lowers himself onto me again, careful of my stomach, and begins to bite my neck softly. I reach for the already hard bulge in his pants and am suddenly frantic to get his pants off. Helping him do so, I moan at the sight of him. And then that's it. We make love. I am a strawberry dipped in chocolate. Not once, twice, but three times over. Our skin sticks together with sweat as we both wish it will never stop.

It was everything I hoped it would be. Better even. With Jacob it was more then sex, but not like this. This was the true definition of "making love". I knew from now on, sex with anyone else would never be the same. I'd never known anything like it and I didn't want to know anything more. If I haven't already known, tonight proved that I was irrevocably in love with him. And when we were finished we fell asleep in each others arms. I slept dreamless and soundly for the first time in ages.

The morning after wasn't so great though. I was sore and had to jump out of bed to puke. I was still naked and didn't have time to get dressed _and _make it down the hall. A ran down the hallway, completely ignore Emmett who is just about to leave his room. I barely hear his apology before I'm in the bathroom. Edward comes while I'm still puking, offering me his shirt. When I'm finish, I take the shirt from him. I examine it before putting it on. It was a simple picture of a dying tree. I didn't like it but I pulled it over my head and when it just barely makes it over my stomach, I'm crying.

Edward comforts me until I decide that I am just _starving_. He makes me a big breakfast and it's gone in two seconds. This only makes me cry more, thinking about how I only used to be able to eat half of this. Amazing as he is, Edward continues trying to comfort me, which for no good reason pisses me off. So I storm away and get in the shower. This is where I stand now, letting the warm water fall down my spine as I think. I cry some more and begin to think about another 4 months like this. The thought scares me.

As if it would wash away my thoughts, I stick my face into the water stream. Something causes me to panic and I pull away, rubbing the water out of my eyes. I look around quickly, searching, like someone might actually be there. I try to focus out of the glass doors of the shower and I make out a figure. The figure knocks on the glass. Slowly, I slide the door open a bit. Edward is standing there smiling, all of his cloths off besides his boxers. I can't help but smile back at him. I open the door more and step back.

"Get those off," I nod towards the boxers, "and come join me."

He smiles crookedly at me then starts pulling off his boxers. While doing this he says, "Is there enough hot water left for me?" , then winks. I nod and then pull him in as soon as he is stripped. He trembles as he makes love to me. So much that I get worried.

I grab his wet face and make him look at me. A give him a quick kiss first than ask, "Are you alright?" I say it breathlessly. He smiles, repositions us, and then looks back at me, water flowing over his shoulders.

"I have to remember how to...control myself when I'm with you like this." He says.

He thrusts lightly still, moving his lips back to my neck.

"Please_ don't_ control yourself." I moan. He stops completely and looks up at me. He searches my eyes for a moment and then smiles a smile I have never seen from him. It's seductive and _really_ sexy. Then his lips are back on mine.

He helps me dry off and I help him. We kiss some more and then get dressed. I'm just pulling on my shorts when Edward wraps his arm around my waist from behind. I lean against him, reaching back to run my fingers through his hair.

"I love you." he said, kissing my ear.

"I love you more." I say.

We stand there for a bit, saying nothing, until Edward starts humming into my ear. I close my eyes and sway softly along with his body. There is small knock at the door then. I open my eyes reluctantly.

"We're just headed out to get all the table and chair rentals done for the wedding, would you like to come Bella?" Alice asks through the door.

I turn to look at Edward, who nods that I should go. I wrap my arms around his waist while I shake my head no. He begins to silently argue with me but I cut him off.

"Not today Alice," I smile, "I didn't get much sleep last night."

Edward is glaring at me as Alice replies. "Oh..okay. We'll see you in a bit then."

"You should have went with her, Bella. She could use your help. The wedding is in a week." Edward says.

"I just want to spend the day with you." I say and he smiles, pulling me into a hug. This time I begin humming his previous tune. I start to think about this particular tune. How I remembered it so well, I'll never know. Edward had wrote and played it for me before he left. I look up at him and bring an arm up to stroke the circles under his eye.

"Will you play for me?" I ask.

He smiles with a small blush. "I haven't played in a very long time."

"Please?" I say, kissing his chin.

"Alright." he rolls his eyes with a smile.

He grabs my hand and leads me into the hall. We walk past Emmett's empty room.

"Where is Emmett?" I ask.

"He said something about a hike with Rose." He says to me and we stop at the top of the stairs. He quickly turns around and grabs my face. He kisses me lightly and pulls away, a satisfied smile on his lips as I breathe unevenly. I roll my eyes at him and he lets out a small chuckle, again grabbing my hand and leading me down the stairs.

When we reach the piano, he pulls the stool out for me. Even though it hasn't been used in quite sometime, not one speck of dust could be found on the mahogany surface. I run my finger on the key cover as Edward sits down beside me. Grabbing my hand, he kisses it and puts it in his laps. He flips the cover up and inhales deeply. He exhales as he runs his fingers over the keys. He closes his eyes and smiles as he touches everyone. Again, another big inhale and exhale. When he opens his eyes they are trained on my face. He keeps one hand on the keys and then the other come to my face. He strokes the keys and my jawline at the same time. Then the hand that is on my face falls to my stomach which he begins to play on. His fingers on my stomach match he motion he is making on the piano.

He again plays the song he wrote for me many of years ago but it soon had a little twist to it. Not to much to change the songs feeling but just enough to symbolize change. The way I saw it actually was that the little high pitched but soft note our babies. That they were added into the song. I don't know if that was his plan but I loved it. And so did our babies. He played on my stomach for a long time before the song slowly faded away. I hadn't realized that I was crying until Edward wiped away my tears. I put my head on his shoulder. With a sigh, he kissed the top of my head. Whoa, deja vu, I thought.


End file.
